Social Anxiety Support

shyvr6 · 04-20-2009, 12:40 PM

Kind of old topic, so I don't know if the OP will respond or not, but could it possibly be that you like being alone because it's something that you accepted from years of isolation? I noticed now that I'm older it's easier to accept the lonely life style.

Peavey · 04-20-2009, 03:19 PM

As was already stated, introverts are energized by spending time alone. Re-charging. Is this because the stress of being around people wears them down? It does for me. I usually need to step out for awhile during parties - even large family gatherings, just to recoup. I don't have this problem with one-on-one friendships. I still like my alone time and look forward to it. That's the difference. Introverts (loners) enjoy their alone time. SA's are forced into alone time because of fear.

I have a friend who is very outgoing. She is the opposite of me. The more people the better. She says that she gets energized by people and anxious when alone. You can see her light up when she meets up with others. Now which is worse, Social anxiety, or Lonely anxiety?

swiv2D · 04-20-2009, 04:10 PM

Sometimes it's a choice I show up at parties even if I don't want to I prefer being alone I think that's my choice more than anything but it's definately been influenced by social anxiety. My past failures with socializing made me into recluse.

Dying note · 04-20-2009, 04:46 PM

I'm very introverted and happen to think my social anxiety comes more from the bad experiences I've had with people than anything else. It's always been as if others have a problem with the way I naturally am- quiet, out of the way, loner type. Once a certain amount of people started acting as if I had a problem or was 'wrong' in some major way, it started getting in my head in an unhealthy way, leaving me now anxious all the time about talking to people or even putting myself around them more than is needed. I honestly don't care if I have relationships with others as much as I care about controlling my anxiety when I do have to be in social situations. Maybe that makes no sense, but anyway...

BeachGaBulldog · 04-21-2009, 04:26 PM

I am a loner and have been for a long time. I prefer the time alone, in fact, I look forward to it. I don't have any friends, and have learned to just accept it. Growing up I tried to be friends, but people would always hurt me, so I said to hell with it. Sometimes I wish I had a friend, but to me, the negatives outweigh the plusses.

Bredwh · 04-22-2009, 09:21 PM

I'm not a loner because I don't choose to be alone. I don't like to be alone for too long. I find it fun to be around people but my social anxiety prevents me from doing so or from talking to them if I am around them. Socially anxious extrovert. Extrovert by nature, but behave like an introvert. This is why I am so depressed.

bht96 · 04-22-2009, 09:36 PM

If you are bothered by being alone and not interacting enough then you would have SA. If you are totally cool with your behaviors then there wouldn't be much of a problem. I am a loner, but I hate myself for it. I realize that I can't to to where I want to be in life if I continue down the path of hiding all the time. I want friends because of the benefits. Friends can help you make contacts that can further your career. The only reason why I don't have friends and avoid social situations is because I am scared that I will be ridiculed. And I hate myself for it. Deep down, I long for social interaction, so this is why I have SAD.

climbingupthewall · 04-24-2009, 11:45 PM

A pervasive feeling of loneliness has haunted me my whole life. I've always been an introvert and I couldn't imagine life any other way (and I like this). I miss a lot of the people who I've lost contact with over the years...I'm sick of being a loner but it's also very comfortable and familiar. I'd like to be a 'part-time' loner. Even if I was close with someone, I might still feel lonely. Pretty weird.

04-20-2009, 12:40 PM	#21 (permalink)
shyvr6 Status: Makin Waves Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Somewhere on a map. Gender: Male Posts: 9,645	Kind of old topic, so I don't know if the OP will respond or not, but could it possibly be that you like being alone because it's something that you accepted from years of isolation? I noticed now that I'm older it's easier to accept the lonely life style. __________________ Music

04-20-2009, 04:10 PM	#23 (permalink)
swiv2D Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: U.K. England Posts: 149	Sometimes it's a choice I show up at parties even if I don't want to I prefer being alone I think that's my choice more than anything but it's definately been influenced by social anxiety. My past failures with socializing made me into recluse. __________________ Scars are always tougher than tissue, even emotional ones.

04-22-2009, 09:21 PM	#26 (permalink)
Bredwh Status: Single White He-male Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Delhi, NY, USA (in the Catskills) Gender: Male Age: 23 Posts: 811	I'm not a loner because I don't choose to be alone. I don't like to be alone for too long. I find it fun to be around people but my social anxiety prevents me from doing so or from talking to them if I am around them. Socially anxious extrovert. Extrovert by nature, but behave like an introvert. This is why I am so depressed. __________________ my intro thread + history/description of my SA

04-20-2009, 03:19 PM	#22 (permalink)
Peavey Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: USA Gender: Male Posts: 14	As was already stated, introverts are energized by spending time alone. Re-charging. Is this because the stress of being around people wears them down? It does for me. I usually need to step out for awhile during parties - even large family gatherings, just to recoup. I don't have this problem with one-on-one friendships. I still like my alone time and look forward to it. That's the difference. Introverts (loners) enjoy their alone time. SA's are forced into alone time because of fear. I have a friend who is very outgoing. She is the opposite of me. The more people the better. She says that she gets energized by people and anxious when alone. You can see her light up when she meets up with others. Now which is worse, Social anxiety, or Lonely anxiety?

04-20-2009, 04:46 PM	#24 (permalink)
Dying note Status: SAS Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: U.S. Gender: Female Age: 20 Posts: 36	I'm very introverted and happen to think my social anxiety comes more from the bad experiences I've had with people than anything else. It's always been as if others have a problem with the way I naturally am- quiet, out of the way, loner type. Once a certain amount of people started acting as if I had a problem or was 'wrong' in some major way, it started getting in my head in an unhealthy way, leaving me now anxious all the time about talking to people or even putting myself around them more than is needed. I honestly don't care if I have relationships with others as much as I care about controlling my anxiety when I do have to be in social situations. Maybe that makes no sense, but anyway...

04-21-2009, 04:26 PM	#25 (permalink)
BeachGaBulldog Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Tampa, Fla. Age: 49 Posts: 851	I am a loner and have been for a long time. I prefer the time alone, in fact, I look forward to it. I don't have any friends, and have learned to just accept it. Growing up I tried to be friends, but people would always hurt me, so I said to hell with it. Sometimes I wish I had a friend, but to me, the negatives outweigh the plusses.

04-22-2009, 09:36 PM	#27 (permalink)
bht96 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Dallas, TX Gender: Male Age: 29 Posts: 147	If you are bothered by being alone and not interacting enough then you would have SA. If you are totally cool with your behaviors then there wouldn't be much of a problem. I am a loner, but I hate myself for it. I realize that I can't to to where I want to be in life if I continue down the path of hiding all the time. I want friends because of the benefits. Friends can help you make contacts that can further your career. The only reason why I don't have friends and avoid social situations is because I am scared that I will be ridiculed. And I hate myself for it. Deep down, I long for social interaction, so this is why I have SAD.

04-24-2009, 11:45 PM	#28 (permalink)
climbingupthewall Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Midwestern United States Gender: Male Age: 27 Posts: 31	A pervasive feeling of loneliness has haunted me my whole life. I've always been an introvert and I couldn't imagine life any other way (and I like this). I miss a lot of the people who I've lost contact with over the years...I'm sick of being a loner but it's also very comfortable and familiar. I'd like to be a 'part-time' loner. Even if I was close with someone, I might still feel lonely. Pretty weird.