Do you ever feel like a total loser compared to other people? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-12-2013, 07:18 AM Thread Starter
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Do you ever feel like a total loser compared to other people?

First off, sorry if there are already a million threads like this, I just wanted to explain from my point of view how I feel.

I feel like I am behind everyone else when it comes to life experience and I feel bad about my past and the future. I hate to say it, but even being on this site makes me feel like I am inadequate and that anyone else reading this probably thinks we are all losers...

I just feel like there are so many standards and expectations put on us in life that are really hard to live up to. For example, just thinking about the idea of still being single at 30 literally makes me almost have a panic attack. I feel that not only do I have to make friends, get into a relationship, marriage, kids, job etc. but I have to do it all while I'm in my 20s. And reading stuff on the internet especially, about what is supposed to be normal, like reading about people 'swallowing the red pill', really scares me.

And then there are the memories of childhood and the feeling of the separation from innocence into this world where nothing is handed to you. Its just so painful to think about life, its painful to age and have life pass you by. Just living hurts for me. And it seems no one else has it this hard, it seems like everyone else is living the 'correct' way and I'm living the 'wrong' way.

Sometimes I think that the way I live is so bad and ive made so many mistakes, that nothing will ever get better no matter what. As of right now, I am living with a constant low buzzing of anxiety in my stomach and the only thing that makes it go away is tv or the internet or distraction. Then when I snap back into reality this panic feeling comes back into me. Not only do I feel like a loser, in fact that is such a nice word compared to what I feel, but that I really am worthless and will never find happiness.

It's just a ride... - Bill Hicks
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-12-2013, 09:22 AM
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I'm the exact same. And I know I will never be happy.

I never had a social life in high school, I'm not good looking, I'm not funny and I'm just a general bore to be around. I can't see why anybody would want to be my friend let alone have a girl interested in me.

I'm ****ed for university, plain and simple.

Originally Posted by minimized View Post
Doncha just love how anxiety completely castrates you while leaving your libido intact?

Did a medieval torturer think this up?
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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-12-2013, 01:16 PM
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Totally.People at my age get married,divorce,have kids etc.They are moving at the speed of light,while i'm still dazzled.

"You donít even know what art really is. You donít even know yourself

"Are you absolutely certain that you're not a product of your own imagination?
And what make you completely certain you're not just a figment of someone else's imagination? "

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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-12-2013, 01:28 PM
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All the time...when I commute on the train I feel so worthless compared with everyone else (couples, bf/gf, happy & sociable people).

Tweet me @FRichie001 for the "Loneliness Forecast Outlook".

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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-12-2013, 02:42 PM
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i think thats why we're here
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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-12-2013, 10:50 PM
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Compared to my friends or heck compared to my co-workers I am a total L O S E R. Let's see I am not married ( I guess that really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things) I still live with my parents I do not have any friends ( my best friend lives on the west coast) yep I am a loser compared to others and like others said that's why we are all here.
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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-13-2013, 05:08 AM
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Idk I think I stopped caring at some point; maybe it won't last forever but with a good dose of self-assurance you can prescribe to or form a view that is more pro-loser, that accepts your place and accepts that it could change at some point, as well as discarding the scorn that others put out. A 'be who you want to be' sort of thing. It's difficult enough accepting one's own issues let alone dealing with other's silly perceptions, so try to ignore them and just live life how you enjoy it, there are lots of wonderful things we loners can do on our own.

Non-SA but might as well be 'borderline'

The conveyor belt of life only goes one way.

y u do dis

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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-14-2013, 12:40 PM
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I always feel like even people on this site have life better off than me. I just have to remind myself that I'm not that bad and that I have good qualities too.

Anytime I get like: , I turn into: a little while later because I know that: is right around the corner...
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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-14-2013, 01:02 PM
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Originally Posted by ShakeyHands View Post
I always feel like even people on this site have life better off than me.
I feel the same and it sucks.
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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 08-15-2013, 02:49 AM
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I completely understand how you feel. I feel the exact same way!

Society does seem to expect a lot from us. Like how one of the first things people ask people they meet "What do you do?". Everyone is expected to have a life, a career, etc..

What am I supposed to say? Oh gee, I hang out around the house doing nothing with the dog and collect money from the government. ;) lol

And everyone always seems to have these huge lives. boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives, children, etc.. And they always have something exciting to tell you about their lives.

Me: Last week I did my laundry!! OMG!! It was amazing! You should have seen the white water rapids during the spin cycle! ;)

I constantly compare their lives to mine and I end up feeling completely insignificant. I just feel like they have to think I'm a total loser. or for people I don't know... Once they find out about me, they'll think I'm a total loser. (Not that I meet people...)

It makes socializing nearly impossible for me. Which is why I basically don't speak to anyone. I have one friend that I talk to, that's it.

I doubt I'll ever have a "normal" life. I'm not too hopeful about my future.

Take care!

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