newbie needs help

[zzr999]

Hi, I'm new to this board and have a question. I have often thought that I may have social anxiety, but I am not sure if my symptoms match.

I am a middle-aged professional with a steady job, good friends, and a good family.

However, I've always had 3 issues for has long as I can remember:

1) When in a social situation with co-workers, or friends, or family, I am fine for the most part, but after a while I start feeling that all eyes are on me. Logically, I know they are not, but for some reason, a part of my brain is "feeing" that all eyes are on me and everyone is watching my every move. I feel like I need to say something funny, or witty, but I'm too afraid to try so I just stay silent.

2) When talking to a group of people of say 2 or more people, and I am asked to speak or I do speak, I often find that my neck and facial area start to heat up. When I look in a mirror after this, I can see that my neck and lower face is flushed a pinkish red.

3) When talking to a superior, like a manager, or boss, or giving a speech or presentation to more than 3 people, I find that my head and neck will start to shake. It's hard to describe, but it's like I get so nervous, that my neck muscles start to twitch and I have to grit my teeth, or forcefully look away from people so my head and neck don't twitch. I will also start to stumble over my words...not stuttering, but just being so nervous that I mess up a word here and there and make myself sound goofy.

So to sum it up, I get so nervous in social situations, that my face and neck turn red, I stumble over words, and my neck and head get a nervous "twitch".

So there you are, my 3 big "issues". Like I said, I am not sure what it is...is it SA? Is it something else?

What can I do about it? Am I fated to always be like this?

Thanks for reading....I appreciate it.

[narcolepsy]

Welcome to SAS. classic symptoms of social anxiety. You need a Dr. to diagnose you. I would go to a Psychiatrist. Your GP may not be very familar with SA

[millenniumman75]

Welcome, ZZR999!

[Slim Shady]

Looks like SA to me.

[Jonn]

Originally Posted by zzr999

Hi, I'm new to this board and have a question. I have often thought that I may have social anxiety, but I am not sure if my symptoms match.

I am a middle-aged professional with a steady job, good friends, and a good family.

However, I've always had 3 issues for has long as I can remember:

1) I feel like I need to say something funny, or witty, but I'm too afraid to try so I just stay silent.

2) When talking to a group of people of say 2 or more people, and I am asked to speak or I do speak, I often find that my neck and facial area start to heat up. When I look in a mirror after this, I can see that my neck and lower face is flushed a pinkish red.

3) When talking to a superior, like a manager, or boss, or giving a speech or presentation to more than 3 people, I find that my head and neck will start to shake. It's hard to describe, but it's like I get so nervous, that my neck muscles start to twitch and I have to grit my teeth, or forcefully look away from people so my head and neck don't twitch. I will also start to stumble over my words...not stuttering, but just being so nervous that I mess up a word here and there and make myself sound goofy.

So to sum it up, I get so nervous in social situations, that my face and neck turn red, I stumble over words, and my neck and head get a nervous "twitch".


What can I do about it? Am I fated to always be like this?
.

Tell the joke!! Or say somthing.. By doing so you are then in the present moment where there is happiness.. As soon as you leave the present momen, thats when negative thoughts can take over, which triggers negative emotions, which then makes you tense.

2. Arent you allowed to blush? Everyone blushes but the difference is that your associating it with something catastrophic (fearing it) like its not suppose to be happening. Just "allow" this to happen.

3. Your fighting the feelings by tensing your muscles against them. You may even be trying to fight it so hard, your holding your breath without knowing it (thats what I did).. Teach yourself to relax in this situation. Take slow deep stomach breaths and make sure your not tensing any muscles, especially your stomach. Take this test: Tighten your stomach muscles and take a deep stomach breath. What you'll find is that you cant. Now losen your stomach muscles and try again. See the difference? When you fear feelings you start tensing muscles and if your tensing your stomach muscles you will then begin shallow breathing from the chest and not the stomach. Doing this causes further tension and symtpoms. Learn to relax and breath properly when your in this and all situations..

Jonn

[lauren_]

yes, it sounds like SA to me. Nice to meet you btw

[TorLin]

Hello ,
Welcome to the SAS website

[zzr999]

Thanks everyone, I do appreciate it. What forum can I talk about these issues on?

Thanks again, and nice to meet everyone.