Social Anxiety Support

88Marian · 01-06-2009, 07:03 AM

hi. I accidentally just deleted this before i pressed send which is always an awesome thing to do ha So now i'm trying to remember what i typed 3 minutes ago

urrr. So hi, Im 20. I haven't always been a complete f*ck-up. .. 4 years ago i was almost going into senior year, outgoing, social-animal, world at my feet kind of thing and then something changed. Something broke & I guess I've been crumbling ever since..
My 'journey' definitely involves an eating disorder, which i thought was the crux of it, but then that developed into body image/ self confidence issues i'd never had before, which was soon joined by the tags of clinical depression & this painful, completely illogical social paranoia which has made me this dumb shell of what i used to be, who i know i really am & what i want to be..

I am looking for some support/insight, but mostly just some understanding & to find people who know what im talking about.. ?

soul spill, over

xx, marian, australia

aw3se4dr5 · 01-06-2009, 09:10 AM

hola marian... sorry i dont know what else to say =/

Hmmmm.. · 01-06-2009, 10:16 AM

Hi Marian. welcome to the forum

Quote:

Originally Posted by 88Marian

[I]4 years ago i was almost going into senior year, outgoing, social-animal, world at my feet kind of thing and then something changed. Something broke & I guess I've been crumbling ever since..

I know exactly what u mean.

Sugababie4 · 01-06-2009, 10:25 AM

Hey Marian,

I'm sorry to hear about that. I have never had an eating disorder...so I can't say I know how you feel. However, your current feelings ring something familiar in me. I don't know how to explain it--it's like in theory, I know how to do what "everyone else" does. Within the confines of my bedroom, I am a confident, strong woman. But as soon as I leave that bedroom, everything changes and I am nothing close to what I want to be. And sometimes I fear that I will never even know what it's like to be the person I want to be. I hate leaving my bedroom some days, and at the worst I'm suicidal.

I'm not explaining myself the way I want to, and it's really frustrating. Well, I guess I'll leave it at this: I have always had social anxiety disorder, so I haven't ever known what it is like not to have a self-esteem crisis every day. But I feel for you because since you've experienced a "normal" life, it must hurt that much more to have that drop in self-esteem.

Anyway, I just wanted to say...welcome.

Toad Licker · 01-06-2009, 11:39 AM

Hey Marian

UltraShy · 01-07-2009, 12:00 AM

88Marian · 01-07-2009, 06:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aw3se4dr5

hola marian... sorry i dont know what else to say =/

thanks aw3se4dr5, don't be saying sorry

hola's are always welcome

) x
Hi hmmmm..(your name makes me side-smile

) & Sugababie4.
& thanks for the welcome signs Licker & Ultra_Shy

hope i get to know you guys better x

millenniumman75 · 01-10-2009, 12:58 PM

Welcome, 88Marian!

NR. · 01-10-2009, 05:53 PM

welcome 88marian

01-06-2009, 07:03 AM	#1 (permalink)
88Marian Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: australia Gender: Female Age: 21 Posts: 28	Maz, Australia, How you doing?? hi. I accidentally just deleted this before i pressed send which is always an awesome thing to do ha So now i'm trying to remember what i typed 3 minutes ago urrr. So hi, Im 20. I haven't always been a complete fck-up. .. 4 years ago i was almost going into senior year, outgoing, social-animal*, world at my feet kind of thing and then something changed. Something broke & I guess I've been crumbling ever since.. My 'journey' definitely involves an eating disorder, which i thought was the crux of it, but then that developed into body image/ self confidence issues i'd never had before, which was soon joined by the tags of clinical depression & this painful, completely illogical social paranoia which has made me this dumb shell of what i used to be, who i know i really am & what i want to be.. I am looking for some support/insight, but mostly just some understanding & to find people who know what im talking about.. ? soul spill, over xx, marian, australia

01-06-2009, 10:25 AM	#4 (permalink)
Sugababie4 Status: SA Sorority Sister Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: United States Gender: Female Age: 19 Posts: 55	Welcome Hey Marian, I'm sorry to hear about that. I have never had an eating disorder...so I can't say I know how you feel. However, your current feelings ring something familiar in me. I don't know how to explain it--it's like in theory, I know how to do what "everyone else" does. Within the confines of my bedroom, I am a confident, strong woman. But as soon as I leave that bedroom, everything changes and I am nothing close to what I want to be. And sometimes I fear that I will never even know what it's like to be the person I want to be. I hate leaving my bedroom some days, and at the worst I'm suicidal. I'm not explaining myself the way I want to, and it's really frustrating. Well, I guess I'll leave it at this: I have always had social anxiety disorder, so I haven't ever known what it is like not to have a self-esteem crisis every day. But I feel for you because since you've experienced a "normal" life, it must hurt that much more to have that drop in self-esteem. Anyway, I just wanted to say...welcome.

01-06-2009, 11:39 AM	#5 (permalink)
Toad Licker Status: Broken Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: A Fruitloop Daydream Gender: Male Age: 44 Posts: 29,596	Hey Marian __________________ All will wither, go to sleep The ones you love you may not keep All you touch will fall apart The dreams you kill will break your heart There's no mercy, there's no rest The void will scream within your chest No one knows and no one will So leave this place that makes you Ill - Madder Mortem

01-07-2009, 12:00 AM	#6 (permalink)
UltraShy Status: Accident of Birth Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Milwaukee, WI (Atheist, Libertarian) Gender: Male Age: 36 Posts: 24,572	__________________ Nothing is ever the way it should be What we deserve we just don't get you see http://www.insureyourgunrights.com/

01-10-2009, 12:58 PM	#8 (permalink)
millenniumman75 Status: Super Moderator Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Dayton-Cincinnati, OH Gender: Male Age: 34 Posts: 38,626	Welcome, 88Marian! __________________ millenniumman75 You are a success story waiting to happen! Live and let live VACUUMS more than a Hoover.... Live and HELP live is better!

01-06-2009, 09:10 AM	#2 (permalink)
aw3se4dr5 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Age: 20 Posts: 164	hola marian... sorry i dont know what else to say =/

01-10-2009, 05:53 PM	#9 (permalink)
NR. Status: male Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: U.S. Posts: 44	welcome 88marian