Social Anxiety Support

allatsea · 10-27-2009, 08:20 PM

Hey everyone! I am happy to find this forum, for once I can rant and rave about being socially anxious without feeling like I'm burderning people with issues they cannot help me with.

I am at a very difficult point in my life, I am at University (again) but I dropped out of another one 2 years ago. Why? Because my social anxiety or whatever you wanna call it was at it's early stages, it began to effect my day to day uni attendance. The idea of co existing with my fellow students with the feeling of nausea and discomfort really took a toll on me.

As of now, I am trying helplessly to stay in Uni. But my social anxiety prevents me from being able to relax in public, whether that be on the train or in a seminar/lecture. I'd have to drink to go into uni, just so that I can feel confident. I was 15mins late and didn't dare go into the lecture room, I couldn't take eyes on me ... so I spent the rest of my time locked in a toilet cubicle drinking alcohol until my next lecture where I'd then be perked up and buzzing, ready to go

My life is an utter shambles. I need help!

Sometimes I'm not even nervous, and my body automatically tenses and becomes stiff - especially my neck and back. But the anxiety doesn't stop with verbal expressions. I cannot seem to articulate myself online either, I find myself rearranging words and sentences until I feel that I am making sense to a certain extent. This is affecting my life in a very bad way. I can't even pick up the phone. I'm desperate, I even drink to buy a pint milk in the local supermarkets or to meet up with close friends.

So ya. Hello, I'm allatsea, nice to meet you all!

millenniumman75 · 10-27-2009, 08:59 PM

Welcome, AllAtSea!

mind_games · 10-27-2009, 09:10 PM

Hi allatsea

rcapo89 · 10-28-2009, 04:30 AM

Hi allatsea, welcome to SAS! I hope you will be able to share your thoughts, fears, and experiences with your fellow SA'ers. I read your post and think you're very articulate. My name is Richard by the way.

fma · 10-28-2009, 05:47 AM

Welcome!

TorLin · 10-28-2009, 05:56 AM

HELLO allatsea

Welcome to SAS !

Trini · 10-28-2009, 07:02 AM

Welcome! Happy to have you on board!

I can relate as I'm sure others can. I couldn't even go to the supermarket, church, or store without my husband. Slowly but surely I started to push myself with baby steps eg my husband would drop me to the supermarket but would stay in the car whilst I sped in and bought a couple of items. I hated it and hated him for making me do it. But a year later I can actually go in by myself and not need him to drive me. Do I still get nervous and zoom through, most definitely, but I look at it as a victory because this is something I couldn't even bring myself to do a year ago.

It all starts with baby steps, lots of self praise and constant reminder to yourself that you're working towards the end goal of being rid of this Social Anxiety.

Oh and I also finally took the plunge and got my driver's license 2 years ago at the age of 33.

Every successful attempt is drop in the bucket and it may or may not seem like a big deal at the time, but it all makes a HUGE difference. And for the inevitable times that you backslide - well try not to beat yourself up about it, you're only human. Look at those times as learning experiences and continue to step out of your comfort zone the next time.

Trini

Toad Licker · 10-28-2009, 10:41 AM

Hey allatsea welcome.

Fuzzy Logic · 10-28-2009, 01:34 PM

Sorry to hear that you are in such a bad way. Have you seen a doctor? Medication and talking to a therapist would help you take some positive steps to dealing with your fears.

spacefiller · 10-28-2009, 04:09 PM

Welcome allatsea!

Andrew1980 · 10-29-2009, 02:20 AM

Hey allatsea, what are you studying at uni? I just went back recently to study computer science and really like it but my OCD and SA make things very difficult.

10-27-2009, 08:20 PM	#1 (permalink)
allatsea Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Age: 20 Posts: 2	Hi I'm all at sea but not an alchy. Hey everyone! I am happy to find this forum, for once I can rant and rave about being socially anxious without feeling like I'm burderning people with issues they cannot help me with. I am at a very difficult point in my life, I am at University (again) but I dropped out of another one 2 years ago. Why? Because my social anxiety or whatever you wanna call it was at it's early stages, it began to effect my day to day uni attendance. The idea of co existing with my fellow students with the feeling of nausea and discomfort really took a toll on me. As of now, I am trying helplessly to stay in Uni. But my social anxiety prevents me from being able to relax in public, whether that be on the train or in a seminar/lecture. I'd have to drink to go into uni, just so that I can feel confident. I was 15mins late and didn't dare go into the lecture room, I couldn't take eyes on me ... so I spent the rest of my time locked in a toilet cubicle drinking alcohol until my next lecture where I'd then be perked up and buzzing, ready to go My life is an utter shambles. I need help! Sometimes I'm not even nervous, and my body automatically tenses and becomes stiff - especially my neck and back. But the anxiety doesn't stop with verbal expressions. I cannot seem to articulate myself online either, I find myself rearranging words and sentences until I feel that I am making sense to a certain extent. This is affecting my life in a very bad way. I can't even pick up the phone. I'm desperate, I even drink to buy a pint milk in the local supermarkets or to meet up with close friends. So ya. Hello, I'm allatsea, nice to meet you all!

10-27-2009, 08:59 PM	#2 (permalink)
millenniumman75 Status: Super Moderator Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Dayton-Cincinnati, OH Gender: Male Age: 34 Posts: 38,668	Welcome, AllAtSea! __________________ millenniumman75 You are a success story waiting to happen! Live and let live VACUUMS more than a Hoover.... Live and HELP live is better!

10-27-2009, 09:10 PM	#3 (permalink)
mind_games Status: dances, like a fridge Join Date: Nov 2008 Age: 23 Posts: 1,570	Hi allatsea __________________ "this is not me, this is me reacting to your perception of me"

10-28-2009, 04:30 AM	#4 (permalink)
rcapo89 Status: Exploring the moon Europa Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Georgia (northeast of Atlanta) Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 840	Hi allatsea, welcome to SAS! I hope you will be able to share your thoughts, fears, and experiences with your fellow SA'ers. I read your post and think you're very articulate. My name is Richard by the way. __________________ I see the world being slowly transformed into a wilderness, I hear the approaching thunder that, one day, will destroy us too. I feel the suffering of millions. And yet, when I look up at the sky, I somehow feel that everything will change for the better, that this cruelty too shall end, that peace and tranquility will return once more. - Anne Frank

10-28-2009, 05:47 AM	#5 (permalink)
fma Status: SPA Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Europe Gender: Male Age: 28 Posts: 53	Welcome! __________________ Fighting my anxiety -Blog

10-28-2009, 05:56 AM	#6 (permalink)
TorLin Status: MayTheForceBeWithYou Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: California Gender: Male Posts: 17,058	HELLO allatsea Welcome to SAS ! __________________ MTFBWU (May The Force Be With You) - TORLIN AIM, MSN, YIM: T0RL1N Skype: Tor_Lin Visit me at; ToryLing.com \| LivingAnxious \| Facebook \| Myspace \| Last.fm

10-28-2009, 07:02 AM	#7 (permalink)
Trini Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 77	Welcome! Happy to have you on board! I can relate as I'm sure others can. I couldn't even go to the supermarket, church, or store without my husband. Slowly but surely I started to push myself with baby steps eg my husband would drop me to the supermarket but would stay in the car whilst I sped in and bought a couple of items. I hated it and hated him for making me do it. But a year later I can actually go in by myself and not need him to drive me. Do I still get nervous and zoom through, most definitely, but I look at it as a victory because this is something I couldn't even bring myself to do a year ago. It all starts with baby steps, lots of self praise and constant reminder to yourself that you're working towards the end goal of being rid of this Social Anxiety. Oh and I also finally took the plunge and got my driver's license 2 years ago at the age of 33. Every successful attempt is drop in the bucket and it may or may not seem like a big deal at the time, but it all makes a HUGE difference. And for the inevitable times that you backslide - well try not to beat yourself up about it, you're only human. Look at those times as learning experiences and continue to step out of your comfort zone the next time. Trini

10-28-2009, 10:41 AM	#8 (permalink)
Toad Licker Status: Broken Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: A Fruitloop Daydream Gender: Male Age: 44 Posts: 29,632	Hey allatsea welcome. __________________ All will wither, go to sleep The ones you love you may not keep All you touch will fall apart The dreams you kill will break your heart There's no mercy, there's no rest The void will scream within your chest No one knows and no one will So leave this place that makes you Ill - Madder Mortem

10-28-2009, 01:34 PM	#9 (permalink)
Fuzzy Logic Status: SAS Member Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: United Kingdom, Northern Ireland Gender: Male Age: 23 Posts: 312	Sorry to hear that you are in such a bad way. Have you seen a doctor? Medication and talking to a therapist would help you take some positive steps to dealing with your fears. __________________ “There is but a thin line between madness and genius. I have been trying valiantly to cross it, but I don’t think I’m mad enough yet.”

10-28-2009, 04:09 PM	#10 (permalink)
spacefiller Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 47	Welcome allatsea!

10-29-2009, 02:20 AM	#11 (permalink)
Andrew1980 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Brisbane Posts: 33	Hey allatsea, what are you studying at uni? I just went back recently to study computer science and really like it but my OCD and SA make things very difficult.