Social Anxiety Support

zapapop · 03-08-2009, 11:23 AM

I'm 34, have been dealing with SA since about my freshman or sophomore year in high school. I remember the fear of being called on, not even wanting to say 'here' for roll call, wanting to run from class. Of course I avoided speech class. Went to college for about a year and half and quit because I couldn't concentrate on what the profs were saying or learning because I was so full of worry and fear. I probably skipped more classes that I showed up for. I'm not dumb, I did well in some classes regardless, but I do remember some giggles from across the room sometimes when I would be reading something out loud and that just made it worse (must have heard the shaky voice). I've been dealing with this as of late pretty well, had gotten much more easy going etc. Have kept my job where I'm a supervisor for 10 yrs now. In other words I've become comfortable in my niche, but I still don't like large gatherings like christmas parties.

NOW - I'm going back to school and it's scaring the crap out of me. I wake up lately from nightmares where some teacher is calling on me and I just cannot speak and when I do its mumble/moaning. BUT I need to go back to school for my wife and children as well as myself. My job's not looking as steady as it used to. I've weened myself off paxil over the years but take a .50 mg tablet of xanax in the morning and a half tab of that in the evening.

ncislover · 03-08-2009, 12:20 PM

hey, welcome!

UltraShy · 03-08-2009, 02:09 PM

zapapop · 03-08-2009, 02:56 PM

thanks ultraShy and ncislover

Toad Licker · 03-08-2009, 03:19 PM

Hey zapapop, welcome to

zapapop · 03-08-2009, 04:51 PM

thanks toad licker

Dashman28 · 03-08-2009, 05:23 PM

Welcome Zapapop! There's plenty of us older returning students on this site. We should probably start a separate forum for it (maybe there already is one!). Anyway, it sounds to me like you have a really solid foundation to work from. Having been in a supervisory position for so long, I bet you'll find your second go around at school a bit easier than the first. However, there are some unique challenges to going back later in life (esp. if you're going to university and among 18-22 yr. olds!) Anyway, good luck with it and let us know how it goes!

zapapop · 03-08-2009, 07:36 PM

Thank You Dashman28 - Yes, once I get used to the people I'm around I'm able to converse normally without fear but this school thing is getting to me. You're right - the age difference does have something to do with it and the bad experiences from school that I thought I'd buried have started to re-emerge.

sadsurvivor · 03-08-2009, 10:14 PM

Hey, welcome from another Louisianian. I know where you are coming from with the whole school thing. I'm taking a break from college because it just got to be too much for me. In my major I had to do a lot of presentations, communicating, group projects...and I wasn't good at it. If a teacher called on me I would usually say I didn't know because I was too nervous to think or speak. I think that a lot of people don't like being called on including people without SA. If someone laughs while you are talking, try laughing with them or just smiling if you find it amusing or ignoring them (whatever best fits the situation). I've witnessed people doing just that while talking or giving a presentation. Sometimes the laughter may not be directed at you even though it seems that way.

power2theweak · 03-09-2009, 07:43 AM

Hi, zapapop!!! Welcome! I just recently went back to school after about a ten-year break. It was difficult at times, but I made it through! Send me a PM if you'd like to chat.

Best of luck to you!

millenniumman75 · 03-29-2009, 06:46 PM

Welcome, Zapapop!

laura024 · 03-29-2009, 06:48 PM

Welcome zapapop. I hope you like the forum.

TorLin · 03-29-2009, 10:23 PM

HELLO, Welcome

to the SAS

forum !

jfk1116 · 03-30-2009, 09:38 AM

Hello, welcome to the site!!! Enjoy your stay

03-08-2009, 11:23 AM	#1 (permalink)
zapapop Status: SAS Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: louisiana Gender: Male Posts: 25	hello from Louisiana I'm 34, have been dealing with SA since about my freshman or sophomore year in high school. I remember the fear of being called on, not even wanting to say 'here' for roll call, wanting to run from class. Of course I avoided speech class. Went to college for about a year and half and quit because I couldn't concentrate on what the profs were saying or learning because I was so full of worry and fear. I probably skipped more classes that I showed up for. I'm not dumb, I did well in some classes regardless, but I do remember some giggles from across the room sometimes when I would be reading something out loud and that just made it worse (must have heard the shaky voice). I've been dealing with this as of late pretty well, had gotten much more easy going etc. Have kept my job where I'm a supervisor for 10 yrs now. In other words I've become comfortable in my niche, but I still don't like large gatherings like christmas parties. NOW - I'm going back to school and it's scaring the crap out of me. I wake up lately from nightmares where some teacher is calling on me and I just cannot speak and when I do its mumble/moaning. BUT I need to go back to school for my wife and children as well as myself. My job's not looking as steady as it used to. I've weened myself off paxil over the years but take a .50 mg tablet of xanax in the morning and a half tab of that in the evening.

03-08-2009, 02:09 PM	#3 (permalink)
UltraShy Status: Accident of Birth Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Milwaukee, WI (Atheist, Libertarian) Gender: Male Age: 36 Posts: 24,572	__________________ Nothing is ever the way it should be What we deserve we just don't get you see http://www.insureyourgunrights.com/

03-08-2009, 03:19 PM	#5 (permalink)
Toad Licker Status: Broken Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: A Fruitloop Daydream Gender: Male Age: 44 Posts: 29,596	Hey zapapop, welcome to __________________ All will wither, go to sleep The ones you love you may not keep All you touch will fall apart The dreams you kill will break your heart There's no mercy, there's no rest The void will scream within your chest No one knows and no one will So leave this place that makes you Ill - Madder Mortem

03-09-2009, 07:43 AM	#10 (permalink)
power2theweak Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 251	Hi, zapapop!!! Welcome! I just recently went back to school after about a ten-year break. It was difficult at times, but I made it through! Send me a PM if you'd like to chat. Best of luck to you! __________________ To all of the friends that I've made here: please keep in touch! Send me an email from time to time! I wish you all the best!

03-29-2009, 06:46 PM	#11 (permalink)
millenniumman75 Status: Super Moderator Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Dayton-Cincinnati, OH Gender: Male Age: 34 Posts: 38,628	Welcome, Zapapop! __________________ millenniumman75 You are a success story waiting to happen! Live and let live VACUUMS more than a Hoover.... Live and HELP live is better!

03-08-2009, 12:20 PM	#2 (permalink)
ncislover Status: SAS Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Alabama Gender: Female Posts: 177	hey, welcome!

03-08-2009, 02:56 PM	#4 (permalink)
zapapop Status: SAS Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: louisiana Gender: Male Posts: 25	thanks ultraShy and ncislover

03-08-2009, 04:51 PM	#6 (permalink)
zapapop Status: SAS Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: louisiana Gender: Male Posts: 25	thanks toad licker

03-08-2009, 05:23 PM	#7 (permalink)
Dashman28 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Florida Gender: Male Posts: 92	Welcome Zapapop! There's plenty of us older returning students on this site. We should probably start a separate forum for it (maybe there already is one!). Anyway, it sounds to me like you have a really solid foundation to work from. Having been in a supervisory position for so long, I bet you'll find your second go around at school a bit easier than the first. However, there are some unique challenges to going back later in life (esp. if you're going to university and among 18-22 yr. olds!) Anyway, good luck with it and let us know how it goes!

03-08-2009, 07:36 PM	#8 (permalink)
zapapop Status: SAS Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: louisiana Gender: Male Posts: 25	Thank You Dashman28 - Yes, once I get used to the people I'm around I'm able to converse normally without fear but this school thing is getting to me. You're right - the age difference does have something to do with it and the bad experiences from school that I thought I'd buried have started to re-emerge.

03-08-2009, 10:14 PM	#9 (permalink)
sadsurvivor Status: SAS Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 188	Hey, welcome from another Louisianian. I know where you are coming from with the whole school thing. I'm taking a break from college because it just got to be too much for me. In my major I had to do a lot of presentations, communicating, group projects...and I wasn't good at it. If a teacher called on me I would usually say I didn't know because I was too nervous to think or speak. I think that a lot of people don't like being called on including people without SA. If someone laughs while you are talking, try laughing with them or just smiling if you find it amusing or ignoring them (whatever best fits the situation). I've witnessed people doing just that while talking or giving a presentation. Sometimes the laughter may not be directed at you even though it seems that way.

03-29-2009, 06:48 PM	#12 (permalink)
laura024 Status: Doing better Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Ohio, USA Gender: Female Age: 18 Posts: 2,252	Welcome zapapop. I hope you like the forum. __________________ Without a stance, we are merely drifters. deviantART

03-29-2009, 10:23 PM	#13 (permalink)
TorLin Status: MayTheForceBeWithYou Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: California Gender: Male Posts: 17,058	HELLO, Welcome to the SAS forum ! __________________ MTFBWU (May The Force Be With You) - TORLIN AIM, MSN, YIM: T0RL1N Skype: Tor_Lin Visit me at; ToryLing.com \| LivingAnxious \| Facebook \| Myspace \| Last.fm

03-30-2009, 09:38 AM	#14 (permalink)
jfk1116 Status: Taking Action Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: OH Gender: Male Age: 29 Posts: 463	Hello, welcome to the site!!! Enjoy your stay __________________ "Even if your on the right track youll get run over if you just sit there"-Will Rogers