Social Anxiety Support

secretlyshecries · 10-30-2009, 08:05 AM

Pretty much throughout my teens I've lived online. When my depression/SA was really bad I basically lived in my room for days at a time and used to visit a few forums for certain interests. I got to know a handful of people and some of us still talk regularly today. It's hard to describe to some people the feeling of 'knowing' them. But once you've had a conversation using a webcam, everything about it feels real. I mean, you've seen them practically 'in the flesh.'

Well, anyway, I fell out with one of the people a few years ago now, but around this year/end of last year we finally chatted again, forgetting what we passed off as a childish fight (even though she said some really hurtful things at the time). It stunned me when she said most of the members of one of the forums we'd used to go on (but not as regularly as another forum) weren't actually real people. Apparently most of them were someone we'll call L, the girl who ran the forum. It's possible my old friend said this L girl had mental problems, I don't know. It seriously weirded me out though. Just the thought of this girl posting most of the messages, replying to herself and ugh. Creepy.

Then today I get that same feeling but x 100. Basically off the forum (the other one, not the one L ran) I kept in regular [online] contact with 2 girls. One very outgoing (from what I gathered) and friendly, the other similar but kind of depressed on and off. Well to cut a long story reasonably short, the first girl (we'll call her S) told me that the other girl, N, had been lying to us about who she was. She'd lied about her name, her age. S found her facebook account and was extremely confused. I don't even know why but apparently when N first joined the forum, she joined as another member and posted there for awhile, then she came as N later.

I know that people lie all the time online, but I've 'known' her for about 3 years. It freaks me out to think about all the frauds I might be talking to. And I noticed her myspace account seems to be gone, so I feel like she never existed. I also feel like the time I spent on that forum, happily in a different world, was just one big lie. Who knows who I was really talking to. It makes me want to spend less time online and just start living a normal life with real people.

nightrain · 10-30-2009, 08:31 AM

Oh, wow. That's very strange to me. I'm not sure what would compel someone to do something like that

rcapo89 · 10-30-2009, 08:32 AM

Yeah in the end its better to have friends in the real world rather than online. But don't worry I'm a real person.

secretlyshecries · 10-30-2009, 11:00 PM

Quote:

I'm not sure what would compel someone to do something like that

Neither.

We'd been calling her by a name that wasn't even hers for three years and it turns out she's a couple of years younger than she'd said. I'm not sure what there was to lie about when she came onto that forum. None of us would have known her in real life so it's not like she had to create this other indentity.

inna sense · 10-31-2009, 12:23 AM

very strange...

10-30-2009, 08:05 AM	#1 (permalink)
secretlyshecries Status: In hiding Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Australia, hiding under a rock somewhere Gender: Female Age: 20 Posts: 569	People lying online Pretty much throughout my teens I've lived online. When my depression/SA was really bad I basically lived in my room for days at a time and used to visit a few forums for certain interests. I got to know a handful of people and some of us still talk regularly today. It's hard to describe to some people the feeling of 'knowing' them. But once you've had a conversation using a webcam, everything about it feels real. I mean, you've seen them practically 'in the flesh.' Well, anyway, I fell out with one of the people a few years ago now, but around this year/end of last year we finally chatted again, forgetting what we passed off as a childish fight (even though she said some really hurtful things at the time). It stunned me when she said most of the members of one of the forums we'd used to go on (but not as regularly as another forum) weren't actually real people. Apparently most of them were someone we'll call L, the girl who ran the forum. It's possible my old friend said this L girl had mental problems, I don't know. It seriously weirded me out though. Just the thought of this girl posting most of the messages, replying to herself and ugh. Creepy. Then today I get that same feeling but x 100. Basically off the forum (the other one, not the one L ran) I kept in regular [online] contact with 2 girls. One very outgoing (from what I gathered) and friendly, the other similar but kind of depressed on and off. Well to cut a long story reasonably short, the first girl (we'll call her S) told me that the other girl, N, had been lying to us about who she was. She'd lied about her name, her age. S found her facebook account and was extremely confused. I don't even know why but apparently when N first joined the forum, she joined as another member and posted there for awhile, then she came as N later. I know that people lie all the time online, but I've 'known' her for about 3 years. It freaks me out to think about all the frauds I might be talking to. And I noticed her myspace account seems to be gone, so I feel like she never existed. I also feel like the time I spent on that forum, happily in a different world, was just one big lie. Who knows who I was really talking to. It makes me want to spend less time online and just start living a normal life with real people.

10-30-2009, 08:32 AM	#3 (permalink)
rcapo89 Status: Exploring the moon Europa Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Georgia (northeast of Atlanta) Gender: Male Age: 20 Posts: 840	Yeah in the end its better to have friends in the real world rather than online. But don't worry I'm a real person. __________________ I see the world being slowly transformed into a wilderness, I hear the approaching thunder that, one day, will destroy us too. I feel the suffering of millions. And yet, when I look up at the sky, I somehow feel that everything will change for the better, that this cruelty too shall end, that peace and tranquility will return once more. - Anne Frank

10-31-2009, 12:23 AM	#5 (permalink)
inna sense Status: SAS Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 3,151	very strange... __________________ duality in oness << new song click here for some songs i did with others

10-30-2009, 08:31 AM	#2 (permalink)
nightrain Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: NC Gender: Male Age: 22 Posts: 825	Oh, wow. That's very strange to me. I'm not sure what would compel someone to do something like that