Social Anxiety Support

kelso · 07-24-2008, 10:58 PM

Living up my own hollow log for some 14 years I am now faced with the fact that I can no longer afford such a luxury.
In Australia rents are getting way beyond anyone on a pension and they either get out or share.
It really is a dilemma for people with SA as they find it so confronting to have others in their lives.
I am an optomist and a realist, believe it or not, and am now confronting the fact that my only option is to hit the road. I am finding this really distressing as there seems to be no way out. Hitting the road wasn't such a bad idea but the price of fuel has whacked that on the head somewhat.
I would willinging share my rented house with four bedrooms and two toilets on 12 acres and interested in self sufficiency, but where the hell do you find these people? I wish to blazes there was a website that catered for this sort of thing. Quite honestly all you have are these sites that cater for "relationships". The last blasted thing on your mind I can tell you!
I am frightened and needed to tell "someone". I could say "sorry for venting all my problems" but that would be deceitful. I know there is no solution to this, "that's the way of it" but it helps to have someone to talk to. It is very, very sad now that we do not have "real" people to talk to.

danielk · 07-24-2008, 11:05 PM

Have you tried posting on Craigslist?

WhiteRaven · 07-25-2008, 12:09 AM

I'm sure there is a way. Websites don't just cater for romantic relationships but also finding friends, etc. Or you may have to look at earning more money somehow. I know I'm not much help, erk. x__x But don't give up. I hope things turn out alright.

Lilfly · 07-25-2008, 03:08 AM

Hey Kelso....I really don't know how it is where you live..but what about disability help from the government? Or housing subsidies of some kind?...Maybe you would qualify.

Also, where I live there's a women's center that helps put roommates together based on their common interests and values. Maybe something like that exists where you are(?). Or if you're so inclined, a church is another good resource to check out.

I wish there was something I could say to ease your fears...because I really do understand where you're coming from. Just know that there are people who hear you and do care.

~Lilfly

Atticus · 07-25-2008, 07:01 AM

I'm sorry to hear this, kelso. Its so frustrating to look at your situation and believe that the only options you have are unpleasant ones. I hope you can find some help through this

mechagirl · 07-25-2008, 05:49 PM

pardon my ignorance as I know nothing of these matters(I still live with my mom, heh), but why did you rent such a large place to begin with?

kelso · 07-31-2008, 03:38 PM

MECHAGIRL believe it or not it is the cheapest I could find at $150 a week. You cannot rent anything this cheap now in Australia.
It would be a lovely place to share with some other people who are interested in self sufficiency eg. gardening, animals.
Believe me I have been trying but I seem to want the impossible, positive people. I really could not cope with people with problems as I have enough of my own! But I live in hope. There are so many homeless people over 50 in Australia now surely there is someone that wants to look on the positive side and get on with life!
Thank you everyone for your support. Means a lot and I realize there is no answer to this but it helps to talk.

not_so_cloudy · 07-31-2008, 03:51 PM

what about hotels? how are those prices? or to move in with someone else, like being someone else's roommate? You will be able to get through this some how. keep posting.

R · 07-31-2008, 04:07 PM

You might want to join that and see if there is anyone there.

personally, I have never joined a yahoo group so i have no idea what to expect from it but worth a shot. There has got to be some kind of self sufficiency Aussie community.

Hell if I had the money I'd come out if you taught me about that stuff.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Self-Suff ... Australia/

kelso · 07-31-2008, 10:04 PM

R, I have indeed joined two forums with self sufficiency in mind but so far, nothing.
I have also looked at a number of "meet and greet" sites but they are truly daunting and make your hair stand on end!
To me, now it is a time to "pull together" as times are getting pretty tough with low income people. I sigh, as it was how we lived in my youth so we are going back wards not forwards - buggar. But as someone older then me said "its the way of it".
I would love to teach people self sufficiency, there is much pride gained with this way of thinking, you become an individual and the self satisfaction that is gained from the knowledge that you are doing your bit for the enviroment is great indeed!

kelso · 07-31-2008, 10:15 PM

NOT-SO-CLOUDY yes I have thought of that in the past but had forgotten that option until I read your post.
Now I come to think of it there are many outback pubs that would cope with myalls like me.
You have hit the nail on the head. If I went out in the back country which is where I love by the way, I could still have my Maremma, company and possibly work!
Thank you for that.

Amelia · 08-01-2008, 08:10 AM

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I hope you're able to find a solution that is good for you.

Does your landlord know of your dilemma? Do you think that he/she might be amenable to helping you find roommates? I'm just wondering whether, if you're a long-standing tenant and have a good relationship with the landlord, they might be sympathetic and willing to help you find a way to stay on.

http://www.flatmates.com.au/

kelso · 08-02-2008, 01:20 AM

AMELIA thanks for that website, I will be following that up.
The landlord does know my position as they fronted here awhile ago and were going to put the rent up to $200 a week. They thought I looked mighty settled and would not want to vacate! I honestly told them that if they put the rent up I would be out of here as I could not afford even a $10 raise.
One thing I know for sure, if I had a flat mate they would jack the rent up no doubt about it so you aren't any better off. If you share Centrelink take your rent assistance off you.
My problem is I was getting $30 rent assistance from my daughter per week, that has ceased and it may not sound much but that $30 a week allowed me to live some kind of a life - as long as nothing went wrong!!
Believe me there are people worse off then me - they are without a home and living in cars, if they are lucky enough to own one, or in parks etc.
I get pinged off with myself as here I am with a room to spare but not the mental capacity to have others with problems share my home.
Buggar this SA, it is a pain in the neck!

07-24-2008, 10:58 PM	#1 (permalink)
kelso Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South East Queensland, Australia Posts: 217	LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? Living up my own hollow log for some 14 years I am now faced with the fact that I can no longer afford such a luxury. In Australia rents are getting way beyond anyone on a pension and they either get out or share. It really is a dilemma for people with SA as they find it so confronting to have others in their lives. I am an optomist and a realist, believe it or not, and am now confronting the fact that my only option is to hit the road. I am finding this really distressing as there seems to be no way out. Hitting the road wasn't such a bad idea but the price of fuel has whacked that on the head somewhat. I would willinging share my rented house with four bedrooms and two toilets on 12 acres and interested in self sufficiency, but where the hell do you find these people? I wish to blazes there was a website that catered for this sort of thing. Quite honestly all you have are these sites that cater for "relationships". The last blasted thing on your mind I can tell you! I am frightened and needed to tell "someone". I could say "sorry for venting all my problems" but that would be deceitful. I know there is no solution to this, "that's the way of it" but it helps to have someone to talk to. It is very, very sad now that we do not have "real" people to talk to.

07-24-2008, 11:05 PM	#2 (permalink)
danielk Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Southern California Gender: Male Age: 37 Posts: 1,127	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? Have you tried posting on Craigslist?

07-25-2008, 12:09 AM	#3 (permalink)
WhiteRaven Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 440	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? I'm sure there is a way. Websites don't just cater for romantic relationships but also finding friends, etc. Or you may have to look at earning more money somehow. I know I'm not much help, erk. x__x But don't give up. I hope things turn out alright.

07-25-2008, 03:08 AM	#4 (permalink)
Lilfly Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: hiding out with Sayid Age: 48 Posts: 389	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? Hey Kelso....I really don't know how it is where you live..but what about disability help from the government? Or housing subsidies of some kind?...Maybe you would qualify. Also, where I live there's a women's center that helps put roommates together based on their common interests and values. Maybe something like that exists where you are(?). Or if you're so inclined, a church is another good resource to check out. I wish there was something I could say to ease your fears...because I really do understand where you're coming from. Just know that there are people who hear you and do care. ~Lilfly __________________ Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals. Agnes Repplier

07-25-2008, 07:01 AM	#5 (permalink)
Atticus Status: under a sheltering sky Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: St. Louis Age: 52 Posts: 3,531	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? I'm sorry to hear this, kelso. Its so frustrating to look at your situation and believe that the only options you have are unpleasant ones. I hope you can find some help through this __________________ Basically I'm just gonna walk the earth. ....You know, like Caine in Kung Fu - walk from place to place, meet people, get in adventures." Jules after his epiphany

07-25-2008, 05:49 PM	#6 (permalink)
mechagirl Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Miami, FL Age: 35 Posts: 2,552	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? pardon my ignorance as I know nothing of these matters(I still live with my mom, heh), but why did you rent such a large place to begin with? __________________ Deviantart Gallery

07-31-2008, 03:38 PM	#7 (permalink)
kelso Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South East Queensland, Australia Posts: 217	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? MECHAGIRL believe it or not it is the cheapest I could find at $150 a week. You cannot rent anything this cheap now in Australia. It would be a lovely place to share with some other people who are interested in self sufficiency eg. gardening, animals. Believe me I have been trying but I seem to want the impossible, positive people. I really could not cope with people with problems as I have enough of my own! But I live in hope. There are so many homeless people over 50 in Australia now surely there is someone that wants to look on the positive side and get on with life! Thank you everyone for your support. Means a lot and I realize there is no answer to this but it helps to talk.

07-31-2008, 03:51 PM	#8 (permalink)
not_so_cloudy Status: aka through it all Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: in a place with a roomate Gender: Female Age: 26 Posts: 69	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? what about hotels? how are those prices? or to move in with someone else, like being someone else's roommate? You will be able to get through this some how. keep posting.

07-31-2008, 04:07 PM	#9 (permalink)
R Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Alb, NM Gender: Male Posts: 969	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? You might want to join that and see if there is anyone there. personally, I have never joined a yahoo group so i have no idea what to expect from it but worth a shot. There has got to be some kind of self sufficiency Aussie community. Hell if I had the money I'd come out if you taught me about that stuff. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Self-Suff ... Australia/ __________________ ------------------------------ I am a rpoud member of the SIMCOHPF Spellchecker is my crutch of holy pwnage foundation

07-31-2008, 10:04 PM	#10 (permalink)
kelso Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South East Queensland, Australia Posts: 217	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? R, I have indeed joined two forums with self sufficiency in mind but so far, nothing. I have also looked at a number of "meet and greet" sites but they are truly daunting and make your hair stand on end! To me, now it is a time to "pull together" as times are getting pretty tough with low income people. I sigh, as it was how we lived in my youth so we are going back wards not forwards - buggar. But as someone older then me said "its the way of it". I would love to teach people self sufficiency, there is much pride gained with this way of thinking, you become an individual and the self satisfaction that is gained from the knowledge that you are doing your bit for the enviroment is great indeed!

07-31-2008, 10:15 PM	#11 (permalink)
kelso Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South East Queensland, Australia Posts: 217	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? NOT-SO-CLOUDY yes I have thought of that in the past but had forgotten that option until I read your post. Now I come to think of it there are many outback pubs that would cope with myalls like me. You have hit the nail on the head. If I went out in the back country which is where I love by the way, I could still have my Maremma, company and possibly work! Thank you for that.

08-01-2008, 08:10 AM	#12 (permalink)
Amelia Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 3,533	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? I'm sorry to hear about your situation. I hope you're able to find a solution that is good for you. Does your landlord know of your dilemma? Do you think that he/she might be amenable to helping you find roommates? I'm just wondering whether, if you're a long-standing tenant and have a good relationship with the landlord, they might be sympathetic and willing to help you find a way to stay on. http://www.flatmates.com.au/

08-02-2008, 01:20 AM	#13 (permalink)
kelso Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: South East Queensland, Australia Posts: 217	Re: LIVING ON YOUR OWN AND NOW FIND YOU CAN'T? AMELIA thanks for that website, I will be following that up. The landlord does know my position as they fronted here awhile ago and were going to put the rent up to $200 a week. They thought I looked mighty settled and would not want to vacate! I honestly told them that if they put the rent up I would be out of here as I could not afford even a $10 raise. One thing I know for sure, if I had a flat mate they would jack the rent up no doubt about it so you aren't any better off. If you share Centrelink take your rent assistance off you. My problem is I was getting $30 rent assistance from my daughter per week, that has ceased and it may not sound much but that $30 a week allowed me to live some kind of a life - as long as nothing went wrong!! Believe me there are people worse off then me - they are without a home and living in cars, if they are lucky enough to own one, or in parks etc. I get pinged off with myself as here I am with a room to spare but not the mental capacity to have others with problems share my home. Buggar this SA, it is a pain in the neck!