Social Anxiety Support

Still Waters · 01-08-2009, 10:53 AM

My life in many ways is very empty. Diversions take on too much importance. Sometimes life just seems full of actors,some of them just happen to be better than others. I'm an untalented one, so my plays seldom work out. I think life becomes duller and duller with age but you have to keep that secret to yourself. The old people won't tolerate you blabbing that one-you'll be thrown out of the club. I've noticed the really old ones become obsessive about their cholesterol , fiber,drinking green tea,etc.etc. Everybody wants to live to be 100-WHY???? By then you're blind ,deaf,and have'nt pooped in a month. I want to feel more alive!!!!!

justpassinby · 01-08-2009, 11:28 AM

I lol'd at "haven't pooped in a month", that is the worst feeling. I have to admit i'm one of those who is constantly monitoring the fiber and making sure all is working well with that.

I guess the best thing is to have a sense of humor about it. I don't look in the mirror so closely anymore and that helps me in some ways because physical appearance is losing its importance.

As far as feeling alive, hmmm....i'm grateful for not having debilitating pain or a chronic illness. I don't want to live to be 100 or anything, but if I get to being around that age hopefully I will have kept myself up so I can tolerate it.

Still Waters · 01-08-2009, 12:02 PM

Dissatisfaction always creeps in. When I was younger I aspired to be happy, now I just long to feel calm. As time goes on it seems I will settle for less and less. Is that what it comes down to? Being able to tolerate things??

Atticus · 01-08-2009, 12:38 PM

What sort of thing made you happy when you were younger? Are those things of no interest now, or do you feel that the time to enjoy them has passed?

Still Waters · 01-08-2009, 12:51 PM

Good questions Atticus.- When I was younger,happiness was always coming soon.- When I get out on my own,I will be really happy. When I get married,then when I have kids. I must admit when my kids were younger,I was happiest. That can't last forever though,although they are easily the very best thing about my life. I do see that maybe I've lived thru them a little too much. In all honesty,I think I lack depth. Maybe I should shave my head, hang out at the airport and meditate a lot!

Atticus · 01-08-2009, 01:08 PM

Just my opinion, but I don't think you lack depth. You seem to have a very inquisitive nature, and you ask about things that seem pretty important (deep) to me.

Looking ahead and not being as excited about what you see hits home for me. But don't you think the over-emphasis on youth in this culture really devalues everything else? And maybe your view of your role is shifting, and you're not sure what's next? In my case I had kids (my ex would scream at me taking credit for her labor and all

) relatively late, so I'm still in prime "dad" time at 51. But I wonder about what the next stage will be for me.

And yet, I find hope in little changes for the better. I just bought some new furniture for the living room, and the process would have bored me to tears a couple of decades ago. I would have laughed at someone being excited about some furniture. But I really kind of enjoyed it all, and sometimes I go sit on the couch and smile like an idiot. I think I have a little more time and appreciation for silly everyday things like that which I endured in the past.

Still Waters · 01-09-2009, 07:18 AM

Atticus,thanks so much for your response yesterday. I was unable to reply,as I was late picking up my son. I have 2 kids-13 and 15. I sometimes feel too young to be old and too old to be young. Perhaps,I have'nt fashioned my life very well for the long haul- I don't have friends. That might have helped me better navigate this "stage" of life(wow,that sounds awful!!) As usual you have the perfect combination of wisdom and common sense. If I ever get filthy rich,I'll pay you big bucks to fly out and give me advice! I do agree with your thoughts on our youth centered culture. With SA we already put far too much emphasis on what "they" think.- The age issue just adds another layer of complication. I will try and be more patient and release this determination to have all the answers this very second! Have a wonderful day Atticus!!

Maslow · 01-10-2009, 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Still Waters

I've noticed the really old ones become obsessive about their cholesterol , fiber,drinking green tea,etc.etc. Everybody wants to live to be 100-WHY???? By then you're blind ,deaf,and have'nt pooped in a month. I want to feel more alive!!!!!

Just wait until having a healthy poop is the highlight of your day! I've started taking Metamucil to help loosen my... oh, never mind...

Maslow · 01-10-2009, 08:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Atticus

But I really kind of enjoyed it all, and sometimes I go sit on the couch and smile like an idiot.

I bought a new recliner about a month ago. For the first week I had it, every time I'd sit on it, I'd go Ahhhhhh... I guess that's a sign of getting old: finding joy in having a nice, comfortable place to sit down.

Atticus · 01-10-2009, 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maslow

I bought a new recliner about a month ago. For the first week I had it, every time I'd sit on it, I'd go Ahhhhhh... I guess that's a sign of getting old: finding joy in having a nice, comfortable place to sit down.

Got to agree with that

WineKitty · 01-11-2009, 10:01 AM

I bought a double recliner couch a few years ago and raved about it for months.

kaye · 02-07-2009, 11:40 PM

My God people doesn't drinking more water loosen the bowel?

I'm not an advocate of focusing on youth and feeling "over the hill," like life has passed once youth is over. This is not the natural order of things. This is the influence of an unbalanced culture.

Life is lived minute by minute. Breath by breath. This one is as precious as the first. Any other attitude is nonsense! Each day is different! Each person, each animal! Life in all its complexity, mystery, is so precious, each minute! Boredom is only another idea in the mind.

My God with all the information available through the internet, there are nearly limitless possibilities for things to do, to try! Life! That is what life should be!

So there's my thoughts!

OliverPilon · 02-22-2009, 12:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaye

My God people doesn't drinking more water loosen the bowel?

I'm not an advocate of focusing on youth and feeling "over the hill," like life has passed once youth is over. This is not the natural order of things. This is the influence of an unbalanced culture.

Life is lived minute by minute. Breath by breath. This one is as precious as the first. Any other attitude is nonsense! Each day is different! Each person, each animal! Life in all its complexity, mystery, is so precious, each minute! Boredom is only another idea in the mind.

My God with all the information available through the internet, there are nearly limitless possibilities for things to do, to try! Life! That is what life should be!

So there's my thoughts!

hey Kaye,
This is so well said!

thanks, just reading it makes me feel good : )

zapapop · 03-08-2009, 02:17 PM

I don't care to live to 100 but I do think that diet and exercise helps with SA. So, if for any other reason than to be calmer I've started eating better and exercising more. I don't drink caffiene or eat sweets any longer, stuff like that.

mypasswordneverworks · 03-08-2009, 03:09 PM

I feel like I have nothing to look forward to as well. I think after I turned 21 a few years ago, life just got very boring & routine

01-08-2009, 10:53 AM	#1 (permalink)
Still Waters Status: Lost And Unaccounted For Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Stuck in the Lost and Found Gender: Female Posts: 668	Excuse me while I whine- My life in many ways is very empty. Diversions take on too much importance. Sometimes life just seems full of actors,some of them just happen to be better than others. I'm an untalented one, so my plays seldom work out. I think life becomes duller and duller with age but you have to keep that secret to yourself. The old people won't tolerate you blabbing that one-you'll be thrown out of the club. I've noticed the really old ones become obsessive about their cholesterol , fiber,drinking green tea,etc.etc. Everybody wants to live to be 100-WHY???? By then you're blind ,deaf,and have'nt pooped in a month. I want to feel more alive!!!!!

01-08-2009, 12:38 PM	#4 (permalink)
Atticus Status: under a sheltering sky Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: St. Louis Age: 52 Posts: 3,531	What sort of thing made you happy when you were younger? Are those things of no interest now, or do you feel that the time to enjoy them has passed? __________________ Basically I'm just gonna walk the earth. ....You know, like Caine in Kung Fu - walk from place to place, meet people, get in adventures." Jules after his epiphany

01-08-2009, 01:08 PM	#6 (permalink)
Atticus Status: under a sheltering sky Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: St. Louis Age: 52 Posts: 3,531	Just my opinion, but I don't think you lack depth. You seem to have a very inquisitive nature, and you ask about things that seem pretty important (deep) to me. Looking ahead and not being as excited about what you see hits home for me. But don't you think the over-emphasis on youth in this culture really devalues everything else? And maybe your view of your role is shifting, and you're not sure what's next? In my case I had kids (my ex would scream at me taking credit for her labor and all ) relatively late, so I'm still in prime "dad" time at 51. But I wonder about what the next stage will be for me. And yet, I find hope in little changes for the better. I just bought some new furniture for the living room, and the process would have bored me to tears a couple of decades ago. I would have laughed at someone being excited about some furniture. But I really kind of enjoyed it all, and sometimes I go sit on the couch and smile like an idiot. I think I have a little more time and appreciation for silly everyday things like that which I endured in the past. __________________ Basically I'm just gonna walk the earth. ....You know, like Caine in Kung Fu - walk from place to place, meet people, get in adventures." Jules after his epiphany

03-08-2009, 03:09 PM	#15 (permalink)
mypasswordneverworks Status: SAS Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: USA Gender: Female Posts: 248	I feel like I have nothing to look forward to as well. I think after I turned 21 a few years ago, life just got very boring & routine __________________ "One's level of confidence is assumed to indicate their level of ability, but a high level of confidence can also be related to one's level of ignorance."

01-08-2009, 11:28 AM	#2 (permalink)
justpassinby Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 429	I lol'd at "haven't pooped in a month", that is the worst feeling. I have to admit i'm one of those who is constantly monitoring the fiber and making sure all is working well with that. I guess the best thing is to have a sense of humor about it. I don't look in the mirror so closely anymore and that helps me in some ways because physical appearance is losing its importance. As far as feeling alive, hmmm....i'm grateful for not having debilitating pain or a chronic illness. I don't want to live to be 100 or anything, but if I get to being around that age hopefully I will have kept myself up so I can tolerate it.

01-08-2009, 12:02 PM	#3 (permalink)
Still Waters Status: Lost And Unaccounted For Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Stuck in the Lost and Found Gender: Female Posts: 668	Dissatisfaction always creeps in. When I was younger I aspired to be happy, now I just long to feel calm. As time goes on it seems I will settle for less and less. Is that what it comes down to? Being able to tolerate things??

01-08-2009, 12:51 PM	#5 (permalink)
Still Waters Status: Lost And Unaccounted For Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Stuck in the Lost and Found Gender: Female Posts: 668	Good questions Atticus.- When I was younger,happiness was always coming soon.- When I get out on my own,I will be really happy. When I get married,then when I have kids. I must admit when my kids were younger,I was happiest. That can't last forever though,although they are easily the very best thing about my life. I do see that maybe I've lived thru them a little too much. In all honesty,I think I lack depth. Maybe I should shave my head, hang out at the airport and meditate a lot!

01-09-2009, 07:18 AM	#7 (permalink)
Still Waters Status: Lost And Unaccounted For Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Stuck in the Lost and Found Gender: Female Posts: 668	Atticus,thanks so much for your response yesterday. I was unable to reply,as I was late picking up my son. I have 2 kids-13 and 15. I sometimes feel too young to be old and too old to be young. Perhaps,I have'nt fashioned my life very well for the long haul- I don't have friends. That might have helped me better navigate this "stage" of life(wow,that sounds awful!!) As usual you have the perfect combination of wisdom and common sense. If I ever get filthy rich,I'll pay you big bucks to fly out and give me advice! I do agree with your thoughts on our youth centered culture. With SA we already put far too much emphasis on what "they" think.- The age issue just adds another layer of complication. I will try and be more patient and release this determination to have all the answers this very second! Have a wonderful day Atticus!!

01-11-2009, 10:01 AM	#11 (permalink)
WineKitty Status: Almost 10,000 Posts :) Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Alone Inside My Mind Gender: Female Posts: 9,967	I bought a double recliner couch a few years ago and raved about it for months.

02-07-2009, 11:40 PM	#12 (permalink)
kaye Status: SAS Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: NoCal Age: 47 Posts: 271	My God people doesn't drinking more water loosen the bowel? I'm not an advocate of focusing on youth and feeling "over the hill," like life has passed once youth is over. This is not the natural order of things. This is the influence of an unbalanced culture. Life is lived minute by minute. Breath by breath. This one is as precious as the first. Any other attitude is nonsense! Each day is different! Each person, each animal! Life in all its complexity, mystery, is so precious, each minute! Boredom is only another idea in the mind. My God with all the information available through the internet, there are nearly limitless possibilities for things to do, to try! Life! That is what life should be! So there's my thoughts!

03-08-2009, 02:17 PM	#14 (permalink)
zapapop Status: SAS Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: louisiana Gender: Male Posts: 25	I don't care to live to 100 but I do think that diet and exercise helps with SA. So, if for any other reason than to be calmer I've started eating better and exercising more. I don't drink caffiene or eat sweets any longer, stuff like that.