Ever feel a little uncomfortable about telling your age ?

[Still Waters]

This may be something that only women can relate to. When I was a kid I never knew my parents age. That sounds strange now,but then it was'nt typical for adults to discuss there age. When I was in my 20's I just could not understand why anyone would be reluctant to let that info. be known . Now,if asked I will say 42,but I feel bad saying it. I know it has nothing to do with my worth as a human being,but even though I get it intellectualy it's still depressing to say it. I think I look good for my age-but even that "for my age" part is a downer. I went to a senior talent show the other night and found it so depressing. Why have a special talent show,as if they can't compete with other ages? When I'm talking with someone around my age and they mention there age-if it's even slightly younger than me I have the strange feeling they've just won at some contest in my head. I find this whole age thing odd. I wonder if it's completly different in other cultures.

[dax]

No. I feel a lot uncomfortable. I'm 29 and look 19. I hate it. I get so embarrassed when someone asks my age. I wouldn't mind my age so much if I just looked it.

[WineKitty]

Despite my recent qualms about my 40th birthday (in late October), I dont lie about my age. I am often told I look far younger than I am. People are usually shocked to find out that I am 40 with a almost 22 year old kid. Maybe someday I will have enough nerve to post a pic (but not today).

[Maslow]

I have clients all over the country and just deal with them through email and over the phone, so they don't know my age -- which is good since most of them are in their 30s. It's a little disconcerting since I should be their boss, but at least I get to work at home.

[RainbowElf]

I understand this hence the reason I wrote a poem.

I have been in chat rooms where people would not accept my advice once they found out my age.

Try to remember though that it is their problem and not yours

[Mjh]

I hate giving my age lol, but I will do so eventually when forced or sufficiently proded. I actually look my age in some respects as well, which makes it worse.

[kaye]

yeah the age thing is real, culturally. Right now my new housemates are a good deal younger than me. The woman was born the year I graduated from high school. Although I don't think she knows it, I think her husband does, since he saw my drivers license w/birthdate. And he's made comments that make me feel he's aware of my relative "oldness." Thanks a bunch!

Yeah one thing is to fight the status quo and just say your age and screw what they think. Also I think people expect if you're in your 40's to somehow look "old" in ways many of us, it seems don't. I like to mention Madonna is 50.

The other thing is to pretend and not let people know your age. I don't know I guess I do one or the other depending.

Yesterday I had a big event, probably should do a separate post, but I went to see about joining a women's singing group. They rejected me, and I've had some really bad feelings coming up. I feel it's partly because I'm older they rejected me. It's been hurting alot. But what can we do, we've got to live. So just carry on. Do what you can, follow your inspiration. But it made me angry, too.

You see someone "brand new" all full of herself in her 20's, and you remember feeling that way, and you guess she's just as empty inside as you were, yet that's the image, the acceptable powerful image, so there she's a-flauntin' it, and there they go buying it.

And life goes on.

[Still Waters]

Wow,Kaye- I so understand what you mean!!- I've even noticed it on this site. The vast majority of people on the site are teens and early 20's,sometimes it's a little depressing! When I respond to a post I can often almost feel them thinking - "how would you know,you're like a hundred years old!"

[Atticus]

I feel a sensitivity about my age here more than anywhere, I think. I'm sure I perceive the frequency of "creepy older guy" posts to be more than it actually is, but when the creepy older guy is 10-15 years younger than me, I have a what the **** moment.

In all environments, at 51 I also feel a huge gulf exists between where I am and where I should be. I'm not sure exactly what I mean by that, but I seem to feel like I should be more accomplished, from career to personal things like dealing with my issues, or finally learning to play the ****ing guitar. That's 2 f-bombs in one post. And the 20 somethings think they invented obscenity

[Maslow]

Sometimes life is like sitting through a bad movie where you're just waiting for it to end.

[starblob]

Originally Posted by Atticus

I also feel a huge gulf exists between where I am and where I should be... I seem to feel like I should be more accomplished

Those feelings are the only issue i have with revealing my age.

I too am told i look younger than 29 - i don't mind that, not that a 29 year old is supposed to look, 'old', but yeah.

[Prodigal Son]

People, society, or American culture is obsessed with being young. I don't know where it comes from, but a lot of people feel this pressure. I don't think it is just appearance orientated.

[max4225]

It doesn't bother me, you can only be the age you are. Except I'm starting to forget sometimes just how old I am exactly.. Is it really almost 2009? The number doesn't define me much. Really the bigger the number the more impressive. If someone was 152 I'd be quite impressed with them. They'd have to have all kinds of tricks up their sleeves. It's tricky to tell age differences in adults, it's more subtle, psychological rather than physical. With youth there's a marked difference in even one year, it's not a linear curve. Sometimes I feel like I'm 152. The atoms that make up our bodies are billions of years old.

[WineKitty]

Originally Posted by max4225

Except I'm starting to forget sometimes just how old I am exactly.. Is it really almost 2009?

2009....

That is a real separation in my life. 1999 v. 2000 and beyond. So much changed in my life right around that time, I was in my early 30s and I began to change a lot around that time also.

Frankly, I haven't been comfortable with the year since the new century started.

[Eleison]

I look younger than I am, and telling my age makes me feel uncomfortable only when people say "ah, but you only look in your early 20s, I can't believe you've done all that in your life!" which brings up feelings of.. being belittled.
And people say I should be grateful I look younger. But I'm not!

[dax]

Originally Posted by Eleison

I look younger than I am, and telling my age makes me feel uncomfortable only when people say "ah, but you only look in your early 20s, I can't believe you've done all that in your life!" which brings up feelings of.. being belittled.
And people say I should be grateful I look younger. But I'm not!

Do you think that you look like you're in your early 20's?

[dontcare]

I've always looked up to older people. I respect them more.

I feel the same way on this site, not everyone's age is immediately noticeable and when I find out that they're older, I immediately give their opinion more credibility. I figure they have more life experience.

It's a cultural thing I guess, I was brought up to respect those older than me.

[Amelia]

I know what you mean about not wanting to say what your age is, and I'm still in my 30s. The fact that this is a youth-obsessed society is getting more and more obvious. I'm wondernig whether society is actually becoming more youth-obsessed or does it just seem that way as we get older?

I've noticed that very few women at work let their hair go grey, for instance. It seems that women are now expected to keep the signs of ageing at bay if they don't want to be written off. So much for progress!

Originally Posted by Still Waters

I wonder if it's completly different in other cultures.

It's interesting you should say that. I saw this documentary on CNN last year about the Japanese island of Okinawa: http://www.okinawaprogram.com/news/20051116_cnn.html The people there apparently live active and healthy lives into their 100s! They showed a 90-year-old woman up a tree picking fruit! It also showed the people being quite active socially, with people of different generations mixing quite comfortably. The transcript says "This is a society that does not turn away its elders."

[yvt]

I am 39, I am not ok with my age because I have wasted so much of my life avoiding people and not living. I am trying to change that. I want to know people again.

[Maddi]

What depressing for me about revealing my age...isn't that I'm older at all. Its that I feel so insecure about the fact that I am failing at life. That I'm 37 and still dealing with this. That a grown woman shouldn't think the way that I do. I look back at all the wild crazy things I did in my youth, the way I acted to cover up my fears....wow, was i dumb....but you chalk it up to being young. Now what can I blame my insecurities on? I'm old and pathetic. I still have no friends, and probably never will.