Social Anxiety Support

Downwiththesickness · 02-12-2012, 04:15 PM

I was reading the thread about turning 30 and a few people said it'd be awesome to be 25 again. What would you do if you could be 25 again, Im 25 and feel like im doing nothing, nothing I wouldn't be doing still when Im 60. What kind of thiings are you meant to do in your 20's??? eeek

sanspants08 · 02-13-2012, 12:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tea111red

25 has been pretty uneventful for me. The years before that were slightly less uneventful. I guess you are supposed to become "established" (or working towards that), figure out who you are (self-concept) and what you want out of life in your 20s. I don't know.

That's my general sense of what I was supposed to do in my 20s.

30s seem far more interesting. With a little age, people seem to respect your opinion more often. I find that I don't have to justify my actions as much these days either. As a person who always wanted to be seen as "grownup" by my peers, I feel like I've reached the space in life where I belong.

Johnny_Genome · 02-13-2012, 07:41 AM

I wish I learned how to care less about all the B.S. in life sooner -- I used to really think people gave a damn about every little thing I did. Now, I realize they don't, and even if they do, I could care less.

hmnut · 02-13-2012, 08:32 AM

I don't see any great thing about being 25 again, save the chance to plan for my 30s a lot better.

25 was really just a turning point in my life. I am pretty sure on my 25th birthday my body literally started to feel older.

If a magic genie gave me the chance to go back to being 25 I would. But if they have me the chance to go back to 27 I would do that to. But if they asked me "how far would you like to go back." I would say somewhere between 12-23.

Those where not only years that I could have used to shape my current life a lot better but they were also years when I had more options to being social. I mean being social was hard for me then, but I had "friends" and I know I could have had more. I was even invited to parties and there were even girls who now I realized actually liked me, but I was too scared to act, and I always thought there would be time... there wasn't.

I find it odd that you say a lot of people say they would go back to 25, because to me 25 is when living with SA becomes especially hard. Your peers really start establishing themselves at 25, everyone around you starts getting careers and married and having kids. If you are stuck in the same place people really start to notice at 25.

I would redo 25 if I could, but I can think of better years to redo.

meco1999 · 02-25-2012, 09:40 PM

I wouldn't do anything differently, other than maybe make better investments having knowledge of how the markets did over the past 6 years.

But other than that, wouldn't change anything.

I wouldn't want to redo any years of my life, ESPECIALLY not the teen years. Those were awful. I consider it an accomplishment to have made it through my teens and 20s alive.

ForgetMeForever · 02-27-2012, 01:34 PM

That's interesting, because I didn't even know I had social anxiety till I saw a therapist in my early 30s.

I'd like to go back to me when I was 16, because that's when the social anxiety I'd had all my life started getting worse. As long as I could bring along all the years of collected reading on this condition. All the things I tried that didn't work, and the ones that do work but take time.

My family saddled me with a bunch of baggage (mostly without meaning to). Heck, if I knew then what I know now, I could probably help some of my family members as well. My parents certainly had less than pleasant childhoods and never dealt with their issues.

If I can't bring along what I know now, then I have NO desire to relive those years. Going through all the emotional pain and awkwardness once was enough, thanks!

ForgetMeForever · 02-27-2012, 01:46 PM

Jeese, I was thinking about it and I spent the time from years @ 15 thru 20 just trying to hide from my peer group and the next 13 and some years trying to force myself to be just like everyone else. That probably screwed myself up more than anything my parents did.

If I could say anything to anyone younger, it'd be: learn to appreciate what makes you different. Learn to nurture yourself and learn self-compassion. Develop your unique talents.

02-12-2012, 04:15 PM	#1 (permalink)
Downwiththesickness Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Australia Gender: Female Age: 26 Posts: 281	25 to life I was reading the thread about turning 30 and a few people said it'd be awesome to be 25 again. What would you do if you could be 25 again, Im 25 and feel like im doing nothing, nothing I wouldn't be doing still when Im 60. What kind of thiings are you meant to do in your 20's??? eeek __________________ She loves him more than he will ever know He loves her more than he will ever show - Swap Meet

02-13-2012, 08:32 AM	#4 (permalink)
hmnut Status: SAS Member Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Freedonia Posts: 500	I don't see any great thing about being 25 again, save the chance to plan for my 30s a lot better. 25 was really just a turning point in my life. I am pretty sure on my 25th birthday my body literally started to *feel* older. If a magic genie gave me the chance to go back to being 25 I would. But if they have me the chance to go back to 27 I would do that to. But if they asked me "how far would you like to go back." I would say somewhere between 12-23. Those where not only years that I could have used to shape my current life a lot better but they were also years when I had more options to being social. I mean being social was hard for me then, but I had "friends" and I know I could have had more. I was even invited to parties and there were even girls who now I realized actually liked me, but I was too scared to act, and I always thought there would be time... there wasn't. I find it odd that you say a lot of people say they would go back to 25, because to me 25 is when living with SA becomes especially hard. Your peers really start establishing themselves at 25, everyone around you starts getting careers and married and having kids. If you are stuck in the same place people really start to notice at 25. I would redo 25 if I could, but I can think of better years to redo. __________________ Starfire: "They are too numerous to fight. What shall we do ?" Robin: "Fight anyway !"

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02-13-2012, 07:41 AM	#3 (permalink)
Johnny_Genome Status: I am, etc. Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Los Angeles Gender: Male Age: 34 Posts: 1,823	I wish I learned how to care less about all the B.S. in life sooner -- I used to really think people gave a damn about every little thing I did. Now, I realize they don't, and even if they do, I could care less.

02-25-2012, 09:40 PM	#5 (permalink)
meco1999 Status: SAS Member Join Date: May 2011 Location: USA Gender: Male Posts: 107	I wouldn't do anything differently, other than maybe make better investments having knowledge of how the markets did over the past 6 years. But other than that, wouldn't change anything. I wouldn't want to redo any years of my life, ESPECIALLY not the teen years. Those were awful. I consider it an accomplishment to have made it through my teens and 20s alive.

02-27-2012, 01:34 PM	#6 (permalink)
ForgetMeForever Status: ...busy... Join Date: May 2011 Location: USA Gender: Female Posts: 360	That's interesting, because I didn't even know I had social anxiety till I saw a therapist in my early 30s. I'd like to go back to me when I was 16, because that's when the social anxiety I'd had all my life started getting worse. As long as I could bring along all the years of collected reading on this condition. All the things I tried that didn't work, and the ones that do work but take time. My family saddled me with a bunch of baggage (mostly without meaning to). Heck, if I knew then what I know now, I could probably help some of my family members as well. My parents certainly had less than pleasant childhoods and never dealt with their issues. If I can't bring along what I know now, then I have NO desire to relive those years. Going through all the emotional pain and awkwardness once was enough, thanks!

02-27-2012, 01:46 PM	#7 (permalink)
ForgetMeForever Status: ...busy... Join Date: May 2011 Location: USA Gender: Female Posts: 360	Jeese, I was thinking about it and I spent the time from years @ 15 thru 20 just trying to hide from my peer group and the next 13 and some years trying to force myself to be just like everyone else. That probably screwed myself up more than anything my parents did. If I could say anything to anyone younger, it'd be: learn to appreciate what makes you different. Learn to nurture yourself and learn self-compassion. Develop your unique talents.