Social Anxiety Support

MavenMI6Agent009 · 04-21-2009, 10:15 AM

Hey,

curious to know what your opinion is on david de angelo in general

One on anxiety and fear:

http://www.daviddeangelo.com/DeepInn...FSMSagodwDrlCA

http://www.daviddeangelo.com/

WintersTale · 04-21-2009, 11:13 AM

I'm a bit skeptical of the whole PUA thing. I can't tell if it's a scam, or if it actually works.

DaveM · 04-22-2009, 11:21 PM

Yeah, I've tried it. David DeAngelo is my #1 inspiration in life.

Here's the deal with his program though and why I wouldn't recommend investing in it quite yet-

His stuff is without a doubt incredible. It changed my life. The thing about it though is, you can't really apply it with Social Anxiety. The program falls more in line with your average guy who has a decent amount of friends, but is fairly lousy at attracting women.

lovinlife · 04-25-2009, 09:25 PM

Okay, David De Angelo's is not the type of advice a person with SA should be taking. I read his book (double dating) and listened to his videos. I applied them, and it turned me into jerk and an *******.

His "cocky and funny" approach is in fact hurtful. Do not read into his advice.

Instead, look into the book "how to succeed with women". This one is sound scientific advice that actually works with real women.

David himself says his approach is for the really hot girls. It is not to be applied to all girls. Trust me.

WintersTale · 04-25-2009, 09:45 PM

^^ Never heard of that book, but I'll look into it. Thanks!

MavenMI6Agent009 · 04-26-2009, 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinlife

Instead, look into the book "how to succeed with women". This one is sound scientific advice that actually works with real women.

thanks lovinlife I might read into the book

n1kkuh · 04-26-2009, 03:09 PM

I think its all total BS and its pop psychology recycled into an acceptable form for men. I just simply don't buy into him, his a business guy, he's not a psychologist, he probably is good with the women, but that doesn't mean his knowledge is directly applicable to you. My best suggestion is to just work on yourself, and get your own life in line, once you do that women will flock to you.

Alll in all, I would say David D is about 80% fluff bs talk, and the other 5% nuggets of wisdom and the reamaining 15% percent just common sense. He has some interesting things to say for sure, but for the most part its just a business scheme and its not all that complicated what he preaches, which is why you don't need countless hours studying his materials, just work on yourself and **** will fall in line.

Some Russian Guy · 05-20-2009, 11:39 PM

So, all these books, about getting dates and success with women, are they all aimed at normal people, or on the very shy and socially awkward ?

Some Russian Guy · 05-22-2009, 03:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lovinlife

Okay, David De Angelo's is not the type of advice a person with SA should be taking. I read his book (double dating) and listened to his videos. I applied them, and it turned me into jerk and an *******.

His "cocky and funny" approach is in fact hurtful. Do not read into his advice.

Instead, look into the book "how to succeed with women". This one is sound scientific advice that actually works with real women.

David himself says his approach is for the really hot girls. It is not to be applied to all girls. Trust me.

these authors who wrote "how to succeed with women"
they also have an audio course "Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome How to Stop Being Shy Without Becoming A Jerk"
it's supposed to be a how to book for getting dates for those who are very shy, and afraid of women

MavenMI6Agent009 · 05-22-2009, 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Some Russian Guy

So, all these books, about getting dates and success with women, are they all aimed at normal people, or on the very shy and socially awkward ?

good question. To my knowledge the material covered generally is used for fun and not intended to substitute for medical advice. So the program doesnt aim directly at sa but does cover general anxiety, depression, confidence, self esteem. etc/

WintersTale · 05-22-2009, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MavenMI6Agent009

good question. To my knowledge the material covered generally is used for fun and not intended to substitute for medical advice. So the program doesnt aim directly at sa but does cover general anxiety, depression, confidence, self esteem. etc/

But if you're anxious and 'choke' normally, how are a bunch of jokes and dating tricks going to help you in the long run. Wouldn't it be better to go to the source (deep rooted anxiety issues), instead of putting on a false face?

JS86 · 06-15-2009, 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WintersTale

I'm a bit skeptical of the whole PUA thing. I can't tell if it's a scam, or if it actually works.

I don't blame you. To me it is one skewed view of flirting and seduction, or whatever you want to call it.

Personally I am a fan of the SIRC Guide to Flirting. It appears detached and grounded in research.

rickthegreat · 06-20-2009, 05:20 PM

I like to take information from pretty much everywhere. I think they all have some valid points, so I would recommend him. I think his stuff is decent. Even if you don't practice it, it kinda opens your eyes and let's you look at things differently. I mean I used to be very uptight, and I got books (just regular books on SA, shyness etc on Amazon), found his stuff free (ya know...samples...torrents

) and also other PUA stuff. I think as long as you take everything with a grain of salt and take what you like, or adapt it somehow to fit your style, it can be helpful. I imagine that following his every exact instruction would also work, but I think some of his examples are extreme.

While I don't doubt that they worked, I'm just not sure I want to do some of that stuff. He actually had a guest host, talking about crazy personal ads and the stuff that works. The guest had an extreme example which I personally would not do (ah hell, I probably would now--it's just an internet ad :P), but at the same time, it did open my eyes and let me see how women can see how most ads are just plain boring. In other words he does make some valid points. Him, Mystery and others also talk about it in evolutionary terms btw which opens up another dimension when thinking about socializing in general. But like I said, you can temper his advice and make it your own. I mean I would recommend watching/reading his stuff. These guys do tend to charge a lot of money I think. That's the only thing I don't like about it. If I had a really good job though I don't think I would mind paying for this kinda stuff.

Conquistador · 06-21-2009, 07:21 AM

Yeah i used to drive myself crazy listening to his stuff. I would end up feeling super-frustrated that i wasn't getting it, blaming myself for it that i must not be listening well enough or paying enough attention to it. He has a way of making you do that so that you just don't plainly say his stuff doesn't work. And i've listened to the inner game one with the every act of courage equals to a measurable amount of confidence and the don't give out all the keys to your castle or whatever. Honestly it was one of the most frustrating ones of them all.

bwidger85 · 06-25-2009, 07:56 PM

His stuff is good for motivation, but how many 35-40 years olds you see in clubs picking up women? How many 35-40 year old men are dating 20 year olds? I think it's great he encourages men with low confidence to do certain things to meet women but it holds a lot of the "PUA" stigma to it, which, to me, is more rooted in stereotypical insecurities more than anything. It also makes women seem like another species which isn't the case. Women do like nice guys and you don't have to use "Cocky and Funny" to win them over...

I think most guys just want a woman who they find attractive, who they can respect, and trust. You have to be careful with a lot of the "seduction world" stuff because a lot of it dehumanizes women. Honestly, the more you realize that women aren't that different from guys the more you'll see this stuff to be a bunch of complicated-mess to build your confidence and ego and perhaps(?) make money. There is truth in old sayings: "just be yourself". Because once again, when it comes down to it, even after you've acquired the confidence you were seeking, you probably won't even want those 20-somethings-in-the-club type women... well, maybe you would, but hopefully they aren‘t half your age...

Opie · 06-26-2009, 10:09 AM

His material is really good. Get it from ebay, way cheaper there. His stuff and material from other people like Style or Mystery is very helpful for me I found.

mascarasnake21 · 06-28-2009, 12:17 PM

Any seduction community stuff needs to be taken with a HUGE grain of salt. It can work, but it's mostly you that makes it work and you have to modify/vary a lot of it.

Many of the approaches they mention work, but only because the guys successful with them have unshakable confidence and very high self-esteem. If you don't have either of those, ease into it...you're going to get rejected a lot more than responded well to. You also need a general idea of what your personality's like...if you just use a lot of the lines as written, they'll only come off as pickup lines (which is kind of the opposite of what you want).

Some of the approaches can only be used on certain kinds of women as well. You wouldn't want to give constant backhanded compliments to an average looking woman who's inexperienced, for example.

(From what I remember, don't waste any time with David DeAngelo...you have to pay for his stuff. SoSuave.net has a lot of free articles and a free forum, which all use similar methods and approaches.)

John31613 · 06-28-2009, 07:53 PM

a really good book is 'how to make anyone fall in love with you'..

shynesshellasucks · 06-28-2009, 08:54 PM

IDK what to think about the pua community any more. I used to read a whole lot about pua. Some of their stuff helped, but some of it made me weird and delusional. Some people claim it does work. But PUA gurus like Tyler Durden, Style, Jlaix and Mystery have bragged a lot about their girlfriends. I have seen pictures of their girlfriends and they are in no shape or form 10s, on the contrary to what they have always claimed. Some of their girlfriends are actually ugly or average looking (I'm not trying to be judgmental here).

I think these gurus overly brag or lie about their success with women in order to take money away from us, desperate, shy, socially awkward, guys. I actually heard girls get creeped out when some pua lines are used on them.

I'm still considering going out and trying this stuff anyway, since I can't be worse off than I am right now. Going out is scary, but it can help overcome SA.

Some Russian Guy · 06-29-2009, 12:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shynesshellasucks

IDK what to think about the pua community any more. I used to read a whole lot about pua. Some of their stuff helped, but some of it made me weird and delusional. Some people claim it does work. But PUA gurus like Tyler Durden, Style, Jlaix and Mystery have bragged a lot about their girlfriends. I have seen pictures of their girlfriends and they are in no shape or form 10s, on the contrary to what they have always claimed. Some of their girlfriends are actually ugly or average looking (I'm not trying to be judgmental here).

I think these gurus overly brag or lie about their success with women in order to take money away from us, desperate, shy, socially awkward, guys. I actually heard girls get creeped out when some pua lines are used on them.

I'm still considering going out and trying this stuff anyway, since I can't be worse off than I am right now. Going out is scary, but it can help overcome SA.

Where can i see their pictures ?

04-21-2009, 10:15 AM	#1 (permalink)
MavenMI6Agent009 Status: Cook Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: EL Crapo, Tx Gender: Male Posts: 13,636	David De Angelo Hey, curious to know what your opinion is on david de angelo in general One on anxiety and fear: http://www.daviddeangelo.com/DeepInn...FSMSagodwDrlCA http://www.daviddeangelo.com/ __________________ "The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares." (Henri Nouwen) -------------------------------------------------------

04-22-2009, 11:21 PM	#3 (permalink)
DaveM Status: SAS Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: Los Angeles, CA Gender: Male Posts: 160	Yeah, I've tried it. David DeAngelo is my #1 inspiration in life. Here's the deal with his program though and why I wouldn't recommend investing in it quite yet- His stuff is without a doubt incredible. It changed my life. The thing about it though is, you can't really apply it with Social Anxiety. The program falls more in line with your average guy who has a decent amount of friends, but is fairly lousy at attracting women. __________________ Social Anxiety Support's unofficial dating guru. PM me.

05-20-2009, 11:39 PM	#8 (permalink)
Some Russian Guy Status: Some Russian Guy Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Brooklyn, NY, USA, Earth, Solar System, Milky Way Galaxy, Local group, Local Supercluster, Universe Gender: Male Posts: 603	So, all these books, about getting dates and success with women, are they all aimed at normal people, or on the very shy and socially awkward ? __________________ It socializes with other people, or else it gets the hose again!

06-26-2009, 10:09 AM	#16 (permalink)
Opie Status: SAS Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Garden State Gender: Male Age: 26 Posts: 167	His material is really good. Get it from ebay, way cheaper there. His stuff and material from other people like Style or Mystery is very helpful for me I found. __________________ You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try.

06-28-2009, 12:17 PM	#17 (permalink)
mascarasnake21 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Minneapolis, MN Gender: Male Posts: 18	ah, the seduction community... Any seduction community stuff needs to be taken with a HUGE grain of salt. It can work, but it's mostly you that makes it work and you have to modify/vary a lot of it. Many of the approaches they mention work, but only because the guys successful with them have unshakable confidence and very high self-esteem. If you don't have either of those, ease into it...you're going to get rejected a lot more than responded well to. You also need a general idea of what your personality's like...if you just use a lot of the lines as written, they'll only come off as pickup lines (which is kind of the opposite of what you want). Some of the approaches can only be used on certain kinds of women as well. You wouldn't want to give constant backhanded compliments to an average looking woman who's inexperienced, for example. (From what I remember, don't waste any time with David DeAngelo...you have to pay for his stuff. SoSuave.net has a lot of free articles and a free forum, which all use similar methods and approaches.)

04-21-2009, 11:13 AM	#2 (permalink)
WintersTale Status: Falling into eternity Join Date: May 2007 Gender: Male Age: 27 Posts: 1,506	I'm a bit skeptical of the whole PUA thing. I can't tell if it's a scam, or if it actually works.

04-25-2009, 09:25 PM	#4 (permalink)
lovinlife Status: SAS Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Posts: 14	Okay, David De Angelo's is not the type of advice a person with SA should be taking. I read his book (double dating) and listened to his videos. I applied them, and it turned me into jerk and an *******. His "cocky and funny" approach is in fact hurtful. Do not read into his advice. Instead, look into the book "how to succeed with women". This one is sound scientific advice that actually works with real women. David himself says his approach is for the really hot girls. It is not to be applied to all girls. Trust me.

04-25-2009, 09:45 PM	#5 (permalink)
WintersTale Status: Falling into eternity Join Date: May 2007 Gender: Male Age: 27 Posts: 1,506	^^ Never heard of that book, but I'll look into it. Thanks!

04-26-2009, 03:09 PM	#7 (permalink)
n1kkuh Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: LA county Gender: Male Posts: 444	I think its all total BS and its pop psychology recycled into an acceptable form for men. I just simply don't buy into him, his a business guy, he's not a psychologist, he probably is good with the women, but that doesn't mean his knowledge is directly applicable to you. My best suggestion is to just work on yourself, and get your own life in line, once you do that women will flock to you. Alll in all, I would say David D is about 80% fluff bs talk, and the other 5% nuggets of wisdom and the reamaining 15% percent just common sense. He has some interesting things to say for sure, but for the most part its just a business scheme and its not all that complicated what he preaches, which is why you don't need countless hours studying his materials, just work on yourself and **** will fall in line.

06-20-2009, 05:20 PM	#13 (permalink)
rickthegreat Status: SAS Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Posts: 160	I like to take information from pretty much everywhere. I think they all have some valid points, so I would recommend him. I think his stuff is decent. Even if you don't practice it, it kinda opens your eyes and let's you look at things differently. I mean I used to be very uptight, and I got books (just regular books on SA, shyness etc on Amazon), found his stuff free (ya know...samples...torrents ) and also other PUA stuff. I think as long as you take everything with a grain of salt and take what you like, or adapt it somehow to fit your style, it can be helpful. I imagine that following his every exact instruction would also work, but I think some of his examples are extreme. While I don't doubt that they worked, I'm just not sure I want to do some of that stuff. He actually had a guest host, talking about crazy personal ads and the stuff that works. The guest had an extreme example which I personally would not do (ah hell, I probably would now--it's just an internet ad :P), but at the same time, it did open my eyes and let me see how women can see how most ads are just plain boring. In other words he does make some valid points. Him, Mystery and others also talk about it in evolutionary terms btw which opens up another dimension when thinking about socializing in general. But like I said, you can temper his advice and make it your own. I mean I would recommend watching/reading his stuff. These guys do tend to charge a lot of money I think. That's the only thing I don't like about it. If I had a really good job though I don't think I would mind paying for this kinda stuff.

06-21-2009, 07:21 AM	#14 (permalink)
Conquistador Status: Permanently Banned Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: South Florida Gender: Male Age: 28 Posts: 577	Yeah i used to drive myself crazy listening to his stuff. I would end up feeling super-frustrated that i wasn't getting it, blaming myself for it that i must not be listening well enough or paying enough attention to it. He has a way of making you do that so that you just don't plainly say his stuff doesn't work. And i've listened to the inner game one with the every act of courage equals to a measurable amount of confidence and the don't give out all the keys to your castle or whatever. Honestly it was one of the most frustrating ones of them all.

06-25-2009, 07:56 PM	#15 (permalink)
bwidger85 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Ohio Gender: Male Age: 24 Posts: 706	His stuff is good for motivation, but how many 35-40 years olds you see in clubs picking up women? How many 35-40 year old men are dating 20 year olds? I think it's great he encourages men with low confidence to do certain things to meet women but it holds a lot of the "PUA" stigma to it, which, to me, is more rooted in stereotypical insecurities more than anything. It also makes women seem like another species which isn't the case. Women do like nice guys and you don't have to use "Cocky and Funny" to win them over... I think most guys just want a woman who they find attractive, who they can respect, and trust. You have to be careful with a lot of the "seduction world" stuff because a lot of it dehumanizes women. Honestly, the more you realize that women aren't that different from guys the more you'll see this stuff to be a bunch of complicated-mess to build your confidence and ego and perhaps(?) make money. There is truth in old sayings: "just be yourself". Because once again, when it comes down to it, even after you've acquired the confidence you were seeking, you probably won't even want those 20-somethings-in-the-club type women... well, maybe you would, but hopefully they aren‘t half your age...

06-28-2009, 07:53 PM	#18 (permalink)
John31613 Status: SAS Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Toronto, Ontario Gender: Male Posts: 7	a really good book is 'how to make anyone fall in love with you'..

06-28-2009, 08:54 PM	#19 (permalink)
shynesshellasucks Status: SAS Member Join Date: May 2008 Location: florida Gender: Male Posts: 66	IDK what to think about the pua community any more. I used to read a whole lot about pua. Some of their stuff helped, but some of it made me weird and delusional. Some people claim it does work. But PUA gurus like Tyler Durden, Style, Jlaix and Mystery have bragged a lot about their girlfriends. I have seen pictures of their girlfriends and they are in no shape or form 10s, on the contrary to what they have always claimed. Some of their girlfriends are actually ugly or average looking (I'm not trying to be judgmental here). I think these gurus overly brag or lie about their success with women in order to take money away from us, desperate, shy, socially awkward, guys. I actually heard girls get creeped out when some pua lines are used on them. I'm still considering going out and trying this stuff anyway, since I can't be worse off than I am right now. Going out is scary, but it can help overcome SA.