After giving it some thought (I always change my mind about which one it is), I realized that the cause for all of my anxieties, the depression, the phobias, the low self esteem, the avoidance, the procrastination, the emotional attachment issues, the intimacy issues, the love shyness, is in fact a gigantic and crippling INFERIORITY COMPLEX, developed in early childhood, growing up in a school filled with wealthy children, with strong personalities, from a poor family, with a distant, self conscious and anti social father, who was ashamed of our home, and instilled that shame into me. I am now looking in the mirror and consider myself to be the lowest form of human life. Every other man or woman is better than me. HOW THE F*** DO YOU CURE THIS?
I am ugly, always was so this doesn't help either, even though women seem to be more interested in me, as of lately.
Short story: I was with a girl a few weeks ago, a girl that reminded me of the prettiest girl in class from grade school, a girl I had a crush on, but because of my social status, I would have never dreamed of getting someone like her. And because she reminded me of this girl, I felt so inferior, and instead of acting the way I should have (she was REALLY REALLY into me) I got scared, and even though we kissed, I never took it further. And then, completely blew it with my awkwardness. Plus she lived by herself in a really big, nice house, which made it even worse for me (made me feel more inferior).
So, any ideas? Therapy, meds? WTF? I need to get over this s*** it has been going on for too long...